His Forbidden Life
by Sprouse-Fan
Summary: Leading a secret life is never easy. Especially when you're two confused 16 year old boys. What starts out as something innocent will blossom into much more. It's getting complicated. These are his secrets. This is His Forbidden Life. SLASH!
1. The Start

Chapter One: The Beginning

I guess your wondering who I am, right? Well, my name is Cody Martin and this year I'll be in tenth grade. To most that'd be exciting, only having three years of school left, but to me, well, it's not. You see, I really like school. Even if I get called a geek by Zack. Zack is my brother. We are just like you and your brother probably, except that we're twins living in a hotel. I think its fun, but anyway, back to the point.

I started High School last year. 3 months before 9th grade was over I was forced to change schools due to major bullying. I mean, I've always gotten bullied, but it got bad...really bad, and I ended up in the hospital.

I went to ninth grade in this school for only three months, so i don't know alot of people. Today's a day to make friends. I wish Zack was here, but after all, he had no reason to change schools, and its not like he fooled with me at school anyway.

But thats okay, because like I said, I started a new school, I can make new friends. So enough of the boring part.

It was second period now and I took my place in class. I was always there first, so I watched as the seats around me slowly filled before the tardy bell. I noticed only a few seats remained open after the bell had rung.

"Hello, I'll be your Math teacher this year,my name is-"

The teacher was cut off by the sound of the large door opening and a student slipping in.

"I got lost." The boy was skinny with blonde hair that slightly curled up at the tips, oh yeah, and he had a tan I'd kill for. He was wearing a yellow American Eagle shirt, faded jeans, Vans, a necklace made of some kind of weird rocks, and a back pack hanging off his back.

This was Christian. I had been in his Science class with him last year.He took a seat just behind me and my stomach felt weird. I hated this part.

For some reason, I always get nervous when he is around. I just get butterflies in my stomach and my mouth goes dry. I have no explanation for why, so I only wonder.

Your probably thinking that I'm gay. Well, if so, then your wrong. I'm not gay.So what if I get nervous when another boy is around? He makes me look fairly ugly when he sits beside me because he looks so damn good. Okay, so maybe I think he looks good. So what? You still can't call me gay. I mean, I get nervous around girls too... So I'm not gay.

I heard the teacher stop talking and realized everyone was taking their notebooks and pencils out so I did the same.

"Um, hey dude?" I heard a voice say from behind me. I turned and saw Christian looking back at me.

"Yeah?" I asked trying to sound normal, although my heart was beating so fast that it hurt my ribs.

"Can I borrow a pencil?" He asked.

I instantly stuffed my hand in my book bag and withdrew a lead pencil. It was red.

"Sure." I said reaching him the pencil.

I can't describe how I felt when his hand brushed mine during the pencil exchange. All I know is that I had a strange feeling between the legs. A good feeling.

I also know something else. Even though no one can call me gay, no one can call me straight either...

A/N- Okay, so this story IS gonna be slash, you don't like it, don't read it. But PLEASE no flames either. Also this is in the rated M section for a reason. Because its for mature people. So if you can't handle it, please don't read it. lol. But I hope you like it, and please comment. Thank you.


	2. Lunch Period

Chapter Two: Lunch Period

Lunch period finally rolled around, pizza. Now usually, I like pizza alot, but hey, let's face it, school pizza is garbage and we all know it.

Of course, school lunch was the last thing on my mind. Ever since Christian had caught my eye this morning. Now, you may think that knowing if your gay or straight is easy, but you are wrong, in my case anyway.

I have never liked just girls, I've always been able to tell when a boy was cute. But same goes with boys, I have always noticed a hot girl as well. Believe me, they never noticed me back...

"Go on!" I heard a guy's voice behind me. I realized that I had stopped moving up and it was my turn to get my pizza.

"Oh, sorry." I said, moving up as and threw the line as quickly as possible.

I walked over to the table in the corner, I usually ate alone here. I hadn't had time to make friends. I was about to bite into my pizza when it happened. He walked up to my table and sit down in front of me.

"Mind if I sit here?" He asked shyly. I don't know why though. Why would he be shy. He looked like an American Eagle model...

"No. Not at all. I'm Cody." I said dumbly, I didn't know how to talk to him, he was a god.

"I know." Christian laughed, "We have class together."

I didn't say anything, I didn't want to sound stupid.

"So you have a twin?" He asked, starting to eat his pizza.

"Uh, yeah.. How'd you know?" I asked, wondering how he knew, how anyone could know.

"Someone told me." He said smiling.

"He goes to another school.." I said, wondering who knew about Zack.. wondering how they knew.

"Oh, hey, do you want your pencil back?" Christian asked pulling the red pencil from his pocket.

"Its alright, you can keep it." I said, wanting to know he had something that belonged to me before.

"Thanks!" He said enthusiastically. "I'm never organized, like never." He laughed.

How did this happen to me? A hot, god like boy was talking to ME. To Cody Martin! Was this a cruel joke from god? It just can't be true... it can't.

I noticed Christian getting up to leave. I was startled from my thoughts, and looked up at him. He was looking back at me, deeply. I felt embarrassed, I wondered if I had sauce on my face.

"What?" I asked, turning red, I could feel it.

"Nothing." He said, as if I hadn't noticed him looking. "Hey. I have to go." Christian said turning and starting away from me.

I could be crazy, but I know that I heard it. He said it. Those two simple words that I would have never expected as he walked away.

"So cute."

A/N- I know my updates are a bitch. But I try, lol. Here's chapter 2. Thanks for reviewing guys...


	3. Crossword Puzzles

Chapter Three: Crossword Puzzles

School was finally getting to close to our fall Break. Thanksgiving would be soon and I was actually excited this year because dad would be coming to the Tipton for three days. I walked to 6th period, today being the last day before break. Me and Christian had become really great friends and we were partners for a crossword puzzle today. Today was kinda just fun, no teachers were giving us real assignments.

"Did you see the Red Sox game last night?" Christian asked Cody, marking out something he had just found on his paper.

"I told you I don't like sports." Cody said as he stretched his neck to see what Christian found.

"I know, but I had to try. You really don't know what you're missing. Nothing better than bunch a men in tight -" Christian stopped, and I saw his face redden. "Nothing better than seeing a bunch of men fighting through a tight game." He said quickly.

I didn't look up. I had seen him say almost gay things since September now, and I was starting to feel more comfortable towards him. I liked Christian, more than friends for sure. He was amazing.

"I was wondering if you wanna come up to the cabin with my family the week after Thanksgiving?" Christian asked, leaving the previous conversation.

"That'd be awesome!" I said, maybe a little to excitedly.

You see, unlike most schools, we got two weeks off for Thanksgiving break. Even Zack had to go back. I really hoped mom would allow me to go.

"Hey I gotta go to the bathroom." Christian told me, raising his hand into the air and shaking it back and worth to get the teachers attention.

"Yes?" She asked from the front of the room.

"May I go to the bathroom, please?" Christian asked.

"Of course, but take the pass."

I sit in my seat and continued working on the crossword puzzle in front of me. It was Thanksgiving themed with little turkeys and pilgrims decorating it.

Christians bag was lying on the floor and I saw a black notebook flipped open to a page with lots of colors. I leaned down and pulled the notebook from his bag.

It was flipped to a doodle of race cars that weren't drawn very well. I flipped through more pages and some drawings were better than others. I kept flipping and found a page with red hearts. this was weird. Only red hearts, no words, although the white space between them could have held words. Then a thought ran through my head. Maybe these were those type of markers that needed a special light to be visible. I dug through his bag and sure enough I was right. I found the light. I turned it on and ran it over the page.

My heart skipped beats as I saw what it said. Written in small print all over the page was things like "Cody Martin is hot.", "I 3 Cody Martin", "Cody is sexy.", "I love Cody.", and etc. I was about to try to find more pages when I heard Christians voice from the classroom door, "what are you doing!?" He asked, his face was instantly red, and he looked incredibly sick.

"Nothing. What's this light do?" I asked him, trying to smile like I knew nothing.

I saw relief in his face and he returned the pass to the teacher before returning to his desk. "It's a book light." He said taking it and the notebook and shoving them back in his bag.

"So, we need to finish this." I told him, giving him a nudge in the arm. And again we started working...

That evening as I lay in bed, I thought about what I had seen in Christian's notebook. How could someone like him like someone like me? I smiled as I imagined how it would feel hugging him, kissing him, being more than friends.

Then I stopped and realized that he didn't even know I was gay.

I closed my eyes and saw that page in his notebook. I had butterfly's in my stomach. I had never been so happy. So full of hope. I liked him too. I hearted him too. I thought he was sexy too.

Was it finally happening? Was I becoming...someone?

I looked outside just as a shooting star passed my window.

...I wish. I wish for love. I wish for happiness... I wish... for Christian.

* * *

A/N- Sorry that my updates have been so spaced. I've been incredibly busy. I don't really know what i'm doing with SI: 4 atm. So i'm thinking about that. Be patient. I know it sucksss. But yeah I try to update this as soon as I can because I like this story.


	4. Dear Diary

Chapter Four: Dear Diary

I opened my eyes to a room filled with sunshine. I stretched smiling. Zack was still asleep. I threw the covers to the bottom of my feet and slid out of bed, yawning as I left our bedroom towards the bathroom. Mom was already at work.

I was brushing my teeth when I heard a knock at the door.I took a drink of water and swished the toothpaste out quickly. I caught a glimpse of myself in the bathroom mirror. Plaid pajamas and bed hair. Ugh.

I put my hand on the door knob and swung the door open. I quickly reddened, seeing Christian stare back. I was so embarrassed. I remembered how I had look in the mirror and groaned.

"Oh, am I took early? It's like 11." Christian said frowning.

"Oh, no. I just got up." I told him, shutting the door. "I didn't know you'd be here today."

Christian looked at me, then sit down. "Well, I was bored, and you're my best friend."

I flipped the tv on and threw him the remote. "I have to get dressed, watch tv til' I come back, ok?" I told him, going back into the bathroom.

I tried to quickly shower and get myself to normal. I could never look good enough around Christian, he was a perfect 10. Not like you'd see him Cody Martin's house. I ran a brush through my hair and sighed, looking into the mirror. He liked me, right? Why was I so worried.

I went back into the living room. Christian was watching Dawson's Creek. When he noticed me coming he quickly flipped to a basketball game. "Did you see that freakin' shot!?" He yelled at me.

"No, I must have missed that." I said smiling to myself. He was so cute.

"What do you wanna do today?" He asked me, flipping the tv off.

Zack emerged from his room suddenly. "CODY?"

"What?" I asked, turning around.

"Is today November 20th?"

"Yes, Zack."

"Noooooooo!! I'm late for my date with Chelsea!" Zack said over dramatically. He grabbed a brush and ran out of the hotel room.

Christian stared as he went. "So that's Zack?"

I shook my head yes.

We stood in silence, staring around for a bit. Then Christian shoved me playfully.

I shoved him back.

"Don't start with me, I will win." Christian said smiling.

"Oh, you think so?" I asked, pushing him towards the couch.

He jumped behind me and I turned around he grabbed my shoulders and shoved me onto the couch, starting to tickle me. I laughed as I tried to shove him off of me. He was too tough, I couldn't budge him.

He was smiling to, not stopping tickling me. "You're so cute!" He said suddenly. Then he jumped back as if he's seen someone get shot. He was red and he looked scared, and sick. "I have to go." He said running for the door.

I didn't have time to say anything. I was still too shocked.

I went into my room and pulled my diary out from under my mattress. And yes I have a diary. Get over it.

I opened it to a blank page. At the top I wrote '11/20- Dear Diary' Then I wrote the one word that summed up everything.

"Thanks."

* * *

A/N- I dunno how consistent my updates will be as I am so busy lately, but I'm gonna try to get back into this. I really enjoy writing this story. And thanks to you amazing people for reviewing. I only write when you review. xD Thanks.


	5. Six Days

Chapter Five: Six Days

It had been six days since I had talked to Christian now. I tried calling him, his mom says he's sick. Thanksgiving was fun, but tomorrow was the day I was supposed to go with Christian and his family to the cabins. I guess he would be too sick to have me now... I frowned and threw myself onto the couch, crossing my arms like a 10 year old.

I sit there wondering what I could do. Six freakin days? Why? Well, I knew why of course, but still.

"Hey Cody, would you run down to the market and buy some milk please?" I heard my mother ask as she shut the fridge door.

"I guess." I said, taking the money from the counter and exiting the room. I needed to get out, think, walk.

In the market I kept seeing people that looked like Christian. My heart would speed up, only to realize that it was not him, once it was even a girl. My imagination was getting to me now.

I paid for the milk and was back to the Tipton sooner than I wanted to be. As I walked down the hallway to the suite, i noticed a yellow envelope in front of the door. Whoever had left it had not knocked, because mom and Zack were both home.

I picked up the envelope and read my name back to myself.

Christian.

I hurried into the suite, slipped the milk into the fridge and slung the door to my room open.

"What gives?" Zack asked annoyed.

"Sorry." My words were slurred as I jumped onto my bed. I tore the envelope open and pulled the note out of it.

Dear Cody,

My family is still going to the cabins tomorrow, but by now, i'm sure you would rather hang yourself than stay in a cabin with me. I know. But I just wanted you to know that the offer still stands. Meet us at my house tomorrow at 8am if you still wanna go..

Christian.

I quickly packed my bag. Of course I wanted to go!

Throughout the night all I could do was think of the last few moments I had spent with Christian. "You're so cute." My heart fluttered. I had never felt this way before. It wasn't good, and it wasn't bad. It wasn't something you'd feel often, that I knew.

I woke up at 6am and got ready to go. I didn't bother to wake mom, she already knew I was going. I slipped out of the door at 7 and walked to to Christians house. I got there at 8:02am. A bit late. But they were still loading the car anyway.

Across the yard I saw Christian carrying a box and setting it in the back of the car.

I walked over to him. "Hey." I said smiling.

"You came?" He said in a question like tone. "I mean. You came!" He said taking my bag. He threw it into the back and slammed the trunk down. We got into the back seat, but didn't say much. His sister had the radio up to loud to hear anyway.

Our hands set freely on the seat.

Without thinking I leaned over to his ear, my hand softly grabbing his. Our touch was electric. "You're so cute too."

* * *

A/N: So Sorry that my updates are slow, but i'm very busy. I finish Summer school gym today though, so my updates will be okay again until August 2nd when Breaking Dawn arrives at my door. lol. I hope you like the chapter, I know its not the best, but yeah. Thanks for your amazing reviews guys. Feel free to tell me anything you'd like to see happen, and you might. Keep reviewing! xD


	6. Yell

Chapter Six: Yell

Much of the car ride was quiet. Well, word wise, Christian's sister, Kristen, had had the radio blaring all the way here.

We pulled into the camp site about an hour after we had left. There were only 3 cabins in sight. I guessed these were the ones Christian's family owned. The grass and trees were bright green, 4 to 7 paths wondered aimlessly into the woods. In the distance I could hear a waterfall, birds were occupying the trees above the cabins.

After we had put all of our stuff into the cabins, Christian's mom and dad went for a hike into the woods, with Kristen.

Christian told them that we were going to stay and unpack the cabin we would be sharing together.

I started putting my things in the bathroom. There were several small shelves to set things on. I saved some for Christians stuff. I put my clothes into the dresser that I'd be using. Of course I brought a book, which I quickly hid under my pillow.

"So are you excited?" Christian asked me, appearing from the bathroom.

"Yeah, this place seems awesome." I said, opening the blinds and staring at the sunny sky.

Christian walked over to me, in front of me. "Wanna go for a walk?"

I agreed and we slipped out of the door and up one of the several paths around the cabins.

"Should we talk about what happened?" I asked as we made our way down the path.

"Uh, nothing happened." Christian said, becoming uncomfortable.

"You know what I mean Christian."

He kicked a rock down the path, a small breeze caused the tree leaves to blow freely, it was beautiful here.

"There is nothing to talk about Cody."

"What about when you called me cute?" I felt myself freeze up a little.

"Oh, did I? You're the one who called me cute. In the car."

"Because you called me cute first!" I said, my face reddening in anger.

Christians face turned red too. I knew he was embarrassed.

"Don't be embarrassed! Just admit the truth!" I yelled at him, I was becoming upset, why was he denying it?

"There is no truth! Leave me alone!" Christian yelled back at me.

"Fine. I will."

Before I knew what I was doing, I felt my legs carrying me quickly down the path. I wanted to control the tears running down my face, but I couldn't. My feet hurt as I ran over the rocks and twigs. I should have worn shoes. I flung the door open, slamming it behind me, and jumped into my bed facing the wall.

I didn't want to cry, but I did. I thought he had liked me. I was so dumb.

I felt myself wrapping my arms around me. I felt cold, but I didn't know why.

Behind me, I heard the door open. It shut softly, and then nothing. He must just be staring at me, laughing. I felt my tears fall down my cheeks, silently.

I felt movement in my bed. I didn't know what he was doing.

He slid his arms around me and kissed me on the neck. I felt his body against mine. "I'm sorry, Cody. I'm just... scared. No one knows that I.. that... I like boys."

I rubbed my hand across my face. I turned around to see his face. There was a tear on his cheek too.

"Do you like me?" I asked him, my hand in his hair.

"No Cody.. I love you."

My hand tightened in his hair, as he kissed me. I had never felt this way before. It really was magical. Better than in the movies. Better than in my dreams. Better than anything.

He pulled back smiling. He wiped his hand under my eye.

I smiled back. "I love you too, I always have."

* * *

A/N: Okay, so apparently someone is hating my story. You don't have to read my stories if my grammar is not amazing enough for you. I don't write as a professional. I do it for fun, and usually, in a hurry, because I am busy. If you wanna read for fun, pick my stories. If you wanna read an English teachers work, pick theirs. Thanks. :

Anyway, I will take those ideas given into consideration. I hope you like this chapter. I'll be honest, I don't. I feel like I might have forced it, but yeah. Thanks for reviewing guys. You're amazingggg. lol. And Just curious, do any boys read this? Probably not. lol. But JW. Keep reviewing! xD


	7. The Cave

Chapter Seven: The Cave

I woke up with my face smashed into the car window. Damn it. It was a dream. I felt my heart sink as I noticed a sign saying that the camp site would appear in 3 miles.

"Hey, sleepy head." Christian smiled from across the car. "You must have been dreaming. You moved around a lot."

"Oh, yeah, I guess." I laughed dryly.

The trees and cars around us zoomed by through the car windows.

"I don't know how you slept over that loud, obnoxious radio." Christian said pushing on his sisters seat.

She looked back and rolled her eyes, turning the radio down a notch and acting like she had muted it.

We pulled up to the cabins 9 minutes later. They looked nothing like my dream. And there was no waterfall in the background. I laughed to myself.

It was beautiful though. Breath taking. Green trees, clean air, flowers, paths, though not as many. It was amazing. I loved it.

I saw Christian carrying things into the cabin to the left and began helping him. The heat was high, but the cool breezes helped a lot. More than you could know.

Me and Christian unpacked quicker than I thought we would. Before we knew it, it was 6pm. About 3 hours til dark would fall. We decided to take a walk and cool off.

"The cave is amazing." He told me as we made our way across a grassy field.

"You better not keep us out til dark Christian, if we get lost..." I trailed off as we came to a small stream filled with pebbles and clear fresh water. "This is beautiful."

"So aren't a lot of things." Christian said blushing. Was he talking about me? No. Of course not. That dream was getting to me.

Finally we were standing at the foot of the cave. It was HUGE man. The biggest cave, perhaps the only cave, I had ever seen.

"You can't go in. It's too dangerous. Rocks fall in there all the time." He said grabbing my arm as I stepped forward.

"We walked all the way up here for nothing!?" I asked, pulling my arm away.

"No. Not for nothing." He said blushing.

"I wanted to give you something."

I looked at him surprised. He wanted to give me something? What could he want to give me? I felt my stomach tighten. "What?"

He looked as if he was getting sick. "Nothing. Just kidding. We can go. Sorry." He said quickly, turning back for the path.

I wanted to say something, but I didn't. I walked beside him, we stayed quiet. Christian was blushing.

Our hands hit as we walked down the slightly steep hill towards the field.

I looked at him, his face was cute and worn out, and he looked so adorable when he blushed.

Each touch of our hands was a jolt of electricity, amazing.

He looked at me and I smiled at him.

"I like your smile." He said, looking at his feet as we walked.

My heart fluttered. Our hands continued to touch as we walked. I knew it wasn't accidental.

As we neared the bottom of the hill, I knew that my excuse to keep touching his hand would fade. So in one swift motion I grabbed it, holding it tightly in mine.

This time, it was my turn to blush. Christian looked up at me startled. He squeezed my hand and then relaxed his hand to normal. He smiled at me. And it was beyond cute.

"I like you're smile too."

* * *

A/N- GOTTCHA! You so didn't know that was a dream. haha. This chapter is real though. So I hope you're loving it. And thanks for reviewing. And a boy reads YAY. I was curious. I'm personally a bisexual guy, so I like writing these things now and again. lol. But anyway thanks for reviewing. And continue! 3


	8. Christian's Song

Chapter Eight: Christian's Song

Nightfall had came and Christian's family was in the other cabin, probably getting into bed right now.

"Do you want to go into the woods and have a campfire?" Christian asked from the bathroom, he was brushing his teeth. I had already brushed mine and put my pajama's on.

"Uhhh, I guess so?" I responded questionably.

"It's okay, you can wear those. We won't get caught." I saw him stick his head out the door and stick his tongue out at me, some toothpaste escaped and he quickly wiped his arm over his mouth.

I laughed at him. He was so cute.

He came out of the bathroom in gray boxer briefs. On the right leg was some sort of silver dragon. I tried to look up to his face, but I couldn't. He looked absolutely amazing.My eyes followed the happy trail leading into his boxers as he slipped his shirt on. He grabbed a pair of jeans and slipped them on to.

He blushed. "Sorry."

"It's o-okay." I shook my head and jumped up. "Won't someone see the smoke?"

Christian's face became thoughtful. "You're right. They might. Oh well. No fire." He pulled a guitar out from under the bed and slung the strap over his shoulder. I wondered why he needed it, I hadn't even known he played. He grabbed a flashlight from his dresser and led the way out of the cabin. I shut the door quietly behind me. Christian flipped the flashlight on.

We snuck up a path behind our cabin and quietly made our way into the woods. I heard wolf howls in the distance, twigs broke under our feet. The night was so black, quiet. "I'm scared." I admitted embarrassed.

"Don't be. Those wolves never come down this far."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive." Christian said, stopping and using his foot to scoot the rocks and twigs out of the way. He sit down. "Join me."

He turned the flashlight off.

I could tell he was smiling, even though I couldn't see his face in the darkness. I sit down opposite of him.

"So why are we out here?" I asked, shivering.

"I have something to give you."

"Oh, not this again." I said feeling a bit uncomfortable.

"Listen. I think we both know we... well.. we kind of.. like each other. I think. And, I just, have something I wanna share with you." Christian stuttered over his words, and I smiled at his cuteness, knowing he couldn't see my face. "I get a little uncomfortable talking to you face to face.. I get embarrassed. That's why I brought you out here. I know you're directly in front of me. But it's too dark to see you, so it won't be as hard."

"Okay, I smiled, reaching out to touch him, but just grabbing air. I quickly pulled my arm back before he noticed I was trying.

I could see his outline as he got comfortable, pulling the guitar in front of him.

Suddenly, the silence was broken as he strung the strings of that guitar. The sound was amazing. He played out a song like i've never heard before. It was gentle, not slow, not fast. It made me think of his face, his smile, him. It was beautiful.

He finished a few minutes later and didn't say anything for a while. I wondered if he was embarrassed. I was just about to say something when he spoke.

"I was gonna show you at the cave, but then I realized I had forgotten my guitar. And it only embarrassed me more. And I just thought you would wanna hear it since, well because, and-"

"It was amazing Christian." I said, stopping his babbling. "Did you right that?"

"Yeah."

"I never knew you could play, let alone write like that. It was beautiful. Thanks for showing me."

"You're welcome." He said, stopping abruptly.

I could tell he wanted to say more. But I just waited.

"So you like it?"

"Yes I do. It is amazing, for real Christian, it's just, it's great."

I could tell he was smiling again. I dunno how, but I knew he was.

"Good." He told me. "I wrote that song the day I met you."

I felt my eyes fill with tears. He had wanted to give me that song. As my tears fell, I knew that I loved him, and that I always would.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for being amazing and reviewing guys! I love you for it. It keeps me going. So i'm trying my best to make this sweet and romantic, but truth is, i'm not a very romantic person, and I dunno if i'm doing good. . But THANK YOU GUYS! I've known some of you for quiet a while now. Cause you keep reading my stuff. So thanks! Next Chapter coming soon.


	9. Hug

Chapter Nine: Hug.

Four more days passed, and nothing was really happening with Christian. We hadn't even held hands since the day at the cave. Nothing really since the song.

We were leaving the cabins today. I was ready to go home. This trip was amazing, but I'm excited to have my own bed back.

"We have three more hours. Wanna go for one last walk since we're packed up?" Christian asked, appearing shirtless in the main room of our small 2 roomed cabin.

He was so perfect. His skin looked soft and inviting, perfect. Not one spot. He was so shaped, and ugh, I just love everything about him.

"Yeah. That would be nice." I told him. I had expected he'd put on a shirt but he didn't.

We started up a different path than we usually walked on.

"So, did you have fun?" He asked me, smiling. He made me melt.

"Heck yeah I did. No Zack, No Mom. This was the best!" I bumped my elbow into him playfully. "You were an added bonus."

Christian blushed.

"Sorry." I said, remembering how easily he was embarrassed. He was a cutie.

"I'm gonna miss being around you all the time." Christian said

"Me too."

I rreached out and grabbed his hand. He tensed up at first, but then relaxed.

"I really like you Cody."

"I like you too. Alot." I told him, it felt weird to be so serious about it.

"People won't react well to this." I saw him frown, a hint of fear in his eyes.

"People don't have to know Christian."

We were silent for a minute. Maybe two. I don't really know. The green trees around seemed so fresh, it smelled amazing out here.

"I don't want to have to hide something as special as you from the rest of the world."

When I looked over to him he was staring intently at the ground.

"You are so sweet." I picked up his chin and turned his head slightly so we were facing each other. "You're amazing."

He smiled at me. "You seem to bring that out in me."

I ddin't know what to say to that. He kept saying the sweetest things. I smiled at him. It took me about two seconds to get my arms around him. I hugged him, too tight, I knew, but I couldn't help it. I never wanted to let him go.

When i felt his arms around me, hugging me back, I felt my feet leave to ground. I was flying away. He was so warm and strong.

I closed my eyes, my head resting on his shoulder. I felt him moving and before I knew it, his mouth was pressed against my head. He kissed it. I felt amazing. Was this love? Is this how it felt? I wasn't sure, but I knew that whatever it was, I never wanted it to leave. Because I was here. With the most amazing boy in the world. This was our woods. I felt like we owned them. We shared so much in them already.

These were our woods, it was our time. It was about us.. Us! I loved the sound of that word.

I felt complete, special.

Right here. In my happy place.

Our happy place.

* * *

A/N: Thanks for the reviews.

You guys are awesome. If any of you have aim or msn and wanna talk to me, PM me ur addys. .

Well thanks for reading. Next Chapter will be up soon!


	10. Found Out

Chapter Ten: Found Out

When I woke up the next morning, Zack was standing at the foot of my bed, staring down at me. He seemed a bit mad, but more disgusted. As if someone hadn't taken the garbage out for two weeks. The clock on my beside said 11:40am in red. I groaned.

"May I help you?" I asked rolling my eyes.

"I don't want to sleep in the same room as you anymore." He huffed out, it stung.

"What did I do?" I ask, my emotion was written well on my face. I knew it had to be. It always was.

It was a moment before he did anything other than stare at me with hatred. He walked over to his bed and fell onto his knees feeling around under it for a second. He pulled a small book out that I recognized instantly and threw at me hard. It smacked into my right arm and I let out an "Owww."

I knew what the book was. I wasn't dumb.

Have you ever been in front of five hundred million people? Me either. But I was as nervous as they would be. I was scared, but more than anything, hurt. I was being rejected over something I could never dream of controlling.

"You wanna be a fag, you find somewhere else to do it." Zack said letting the door slam loudly behind him.

I felt myself trembling as I put my diary, journal, whatever under my pillow. I felt suddenly sick. My stomach was twisted in atleast three knots. Empty... but full. Hurting... but jumping.

Would he tell?

Of course he would. Why wouldn't he? He hated me now...

The thought made me sicker. Zack was my best friend..

Exactly.

Was.

I should have been more careful with where I left my things. I should have... gotten a better place to hide it. I frowned, my stomach growled. No way. No way could I eat right now. The nervous jerks in it continued as I heard a knock at the door. Fear washed over me. I knew who it was and I knew who would answer.

I waited nervously for yelling. Movement.. Anything.

I heard the door shut. My heart sped up, pumping more blood than I thought possible.

Christian appeared in my doorway. His smile faded when he saw me. He shut the door without focus.

"Oh my god. What happened?" He flung himself down beside me sliding his arm around me.

I felt strange, but so good. He never took much control on the physical part.

"Zack knows. He found my journal thing. He hates me. He's..." I stopped. There was nothing more to say. I could see the change in Christian's mood, his expression.

"Ahh." He said, his face sadder now. "Explains the look he gave me."

I jerked my head up to look at him. "Look? He gave you a look? I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that."

"Cody. Stop." He looked away from me. "It's not your fault."

It wasn't? It wasn't my fault that I had wrote about him and left it carelessly lying around without thinking of the consequences? Without realizing someone would find it? It wasn't my fault that Zack hated us both?

"Babe, your arm." I looked at my arm. Zack's attack had left me a healthy bruise. It was high enough up to be covered by a short sleeved shirt when I put one on.

"I just need a shirt. Sorry, I just woke up."

"It's okay. You and shirtless go pretty well together." He smiled. I tried to smile, but I knew it was a just weak line, barely turning up at the ends, slapped across my face.

I didn't know how he could make jokes at a time when I was so scared. Scared of exposure. But this was one of the reasons I liked him so much. He always kept things positive. He saw the bright side of things...

--

For the next three days Zack said nothing to me. Or anyone else apparently, because no one knew about it. I went to school and put on my smile, and slowly I was becoming less and less nervous again. Still hurt though. By Zack's rejection.

On day four, after school, I decided to talk to Zack.. Try to anyway.

"Zack?"

He ignored me, scrambling to get his skateboard so he could leave.

"Zack. Please."

He stopped moving and dropped his shoulders, turning slowly to face me, his face blank.

"What Cody?"

"Don't hate me."

"Don't be gay."

My heart was pierced by his words. I felt the blood draining from it. My throat was dry.

"Please. I can't control that! Zack, you have to understand! Don't hate me, Zack?" I was hurt, and a bit more frantic. Not to overly crazy, but he sent wounds into my insides, they were curling up again.

He picked up his helmet and skateboard, and opened the door. He turned back to me. But only for a second.

"Cody, you have to understand. I can't control that."

Slam.

He was gone.

* * *

A/N: My reviewers are gone. D: lol. Jk. But some of you are gone. xP Okay, so thanks for being so generous about this story. I know it's not as amazing as some make it out to be, it's just fun writing. I'm going to put this in the rated M section in the next chapter or two for language and stuff. So I hope the F word isn't offensive in rated T. Look for it there. Thanks for reviewing. PLEASE continue. Everyone who reads. Leave a review. Good or bad. xP Hope you enjoy the chapter. (Sorry about slow updates. I'm reading Breaking Dawn. Slowly. So no one spoil me!) haha. Next chapter soon!


	11. Baseball

Chapter Eleven: Baseball

Baseball try-outs?

What was I thinking? Why was I here? There was no way I'd get picked!

This was the fourth time I had tried out for the school's baseball team. I was in love with baseball. It was just something that I liked to do. Sports bored me to death. But Baseball wasn't a sport for me. It was a pass time... a relaxation method.

I stepped up to the home plate, my sweaty palms grasping the hard wooden baseball bat. I felt small beads of sweat falling down my cheeks from my forehead. The air was dry and scratched the back of my throat as I breathed it in. Around me I sensed many eyes. People trying out... people who surely already had their spot. Coaches. Teachers.. a few parents showing support for their kids, bragging on them.

I got ito position, hitting the bat twice to the ground to make sure I was in the right spot. I needed to be. My eyes connected with the pitchers, a passion showed through. He loved the game too. Todd Jacobs. Of course he'd had a spot since last season ended. He was one of our best pitchers. He pitched at 87mph on a good day.

I inhaled one final breath of dry air and held my bat up, strongly. Todd hit the ball into his glove several times, then placed on foot in front of the other and pitched quickly. The ball zoomed towards me. I swung my bat hard, turning in almost a complete circle. I felt it collide with something. Hard. I hoped that it hadn't been someone's head... like the catcher's. My hand ached slightly.

I looked around me, people stared back. Their mouths open. Todd's eyes were bigger than I knew human eyes could get. He walked over to me.

"No way. No way you hit that ball. Not Cody Martin."

I didn't know what to say. I stood there. My heart swelled with pride. I had done good. For the first time! I had hit the ball! My nerves didn't tackle me this time.

"Amazing." Todd finished before walking back to the pitcher's mound. I set the bat down and moved on, letting the next person trying out move ahead.

"Come over here!" Todd yelled from the mound.

Oh crap. Not this part. I had forgotten. I had to pitch too! No! I couldn't pitch over 60mph. My weakness. All the boys who usually made the team could bitch 70+mph.

I walked slowly over to the mound, the hot sun beating down on my neck. I would have a sunburn from this. Todd gave me his ball and glove. Thank god our hands were the same size. I slipped it on, eww. He had sweated int he glove. Ugh. I tried not to think about it and I focused on the person batting.

I swiftly moved one foot in front of the other and released the ball, letting it sore into the air towards the other boy. He hit it hard, sending it further than I had sent Todd's ball. Of course he did. I couldn't pitch.

After that I made my way to the bleachers while the two coaches and Todd, the team captain.. like every year, decided who would be the other 8 players this year. With only 8 spots, there would be no room for me. There were at least 32 boys out here. At least.

After about 25 minutes. The three of them called all the boys out there. I stood towards the back so that my disappointed face wouldn't be seen, I could get away quickly. Beside the three was a table. Uniforms, bats, gloves. I didn't want to think about losing. I was nervous.

"We have decided which of the 8 of you we'll be taking. Don't be discouraged if you didn't get it. Try out again next season." He spoke in some type of monotone.

Todd stepped forward, looking down at the list of chosen players. I sighed.

"The following will need to look and see if we have your size glove and uniforms available. If not, we'll have to place an order for the right size." He pointed over to the table. I never noticed earlier, but Tyler had the most amazing brown eyes. I wasn't one for dark eyes, but his were nice.

"Okay. Here goes." He looked at us and smiled, then looking down at the list. "Daniel Spencer. Josiah and Ethan Browning. Hunter Evans. Tyler Hinton. Edward Mullins. Aiden Foster. And lastly.." He looked out at us, his expression of surprise has he read my name. "Cody Martin."

I felt my mouth fall open. Shock. I had made it!? What?

I followed the other eight boys, including Todd to the table. Lucky for me, there was a uniform and glove in my size. I grabbed it and a small paper booklet with information I would need.

"Congratulations." He told us. "I hope we picked a good team."

Well considering that the Browning brothers, Aiden, and Edward always made the team, I didn't think a four person change would be too different.

"We start practice on Saturday. Have a good day." He told us.

As I made my way across the sunny field, Christian caught my eye from the bleechers. He was beaming down at me. His white teeth were brilliant. "I knew you'd get it! Told you so!" He said teasingly.

He came off the sixth row and started walking beside me. He didn't get to close, not wanting to give anything away. We were careful about that. Honestly, most of the time, I only felt like friends with him.

He was dressed in different colors of blue. Blue plaid shorts, and a blue shirt with the Hollister logo down the side. Cutie.

"Lucky number seven." I said noticing my uniform number.

The air was a bit cooler now, it must have been about 7:30. I had been there since 4:24. I groaned. We were surrounded by green. Green grass, flowers, tree's. Birds were tweeting over head.The average American homes lining the sides of the road were beautiful to look at, seeming lifeless.

"How long were you sitting up there?" I asked Christian, noticing that his neck and arms had burned as much as mine.

"Since about 5. I wanted to be there so I could see your face when you got it."

I smiled at him. "So..."

I didn't really know what to talk about, I knew he didn't either.

"I think i'm going to Jessie about me being.. gay."

I looked up at him, his face was confused, unsure. Jessie had been his best friend since he was nine. Alot of years. My guess? She already knew. Christian wasn't way out there, but he said things sometimes that screamed gay. Like the thing about watching guys in tight pants in sports... I chuckled.

"You think it's funny?" He asked in his serious tone.

"Oh, no. No Christian. Just thinking." I said quickly, his face recovered. "Do you trust her?"

"Very much so. With my life."

"Then tell her." I sighed. "And hope you're right."

The look on his face told me that my comment had made him uncomfortable.

I stopped him and turned to face him. "Christian. If you are really, really sure, then go for it. See what happens. She may be very accepting... unlike some people." I said, thinking of my brother.

"I'm sorry. You're right.." Christian began walking a bit faster. I knew he was thinking. He always walked faster when he was thinking, his legs moved swiftly through the air, down the sidewalk.

His house came into view. Similar to the others. Big. White. Normal. I wished we lived in a house... not a hotel..

"I guess I'll see you at school tomorrow?" I asked, we were at his walk way now. The one up to his house. It was shorter than it had been last time. Well, not really... but you know.

"Yeah. Count on it. I will call you later." He said, starting up the small stone walk.

I smiled at his back and kept walking towards the Tipton. The walk seemed longer than it usually did. Mostly because I was exhausted. I made my way up to the suite and turned the knob, entering the room.

Zack looked up at me from the couch. "Congrats." He huffed, turning his head back to the television.

"Fourth times the charm." I tried to joke. He kept looking at the tv. I sighed, and started towards the bedroom.

"Cody?" He called from the couch. Still looking straight at the tv.

"Yes, Zack?"

"The Christian kid isn't that bad. Good choice."

I smiled at the back of his head.

It wasn't amazing, but it was a start.. Maybe he was coming around.

Maybe.

* * *

A/N: Wow, thanks for reviewing guys! Amazing people you are. Okay, so I'm gonna try doing longer chapters like this from now on. I hope it doesn't feel rushed. I just go for it. Make it up as I go to be honest. I mean I have a few things I know will happen, but yeah. The Baseball thing just jumped at me when I opened Wordpad. lol. So yeah, I like baseball personally. Hope that dosn't bother you, a bit of sports. There won't be tons. Well thanks guys. New chapter soon!


	12. The Kiss

Chapter Twelve: The Kiss

"Christian, we have got to get this done tonight." I said, trying to pull his attention back to me. We had gotten a partnered assignment in English class today. We had to write an original Christmas story that wasn't all about snow, presents, Santa Claus, and candy canes. It was rather difficult... There were only sixteen days left til Christmas now. Thanksgiving had zoomed by with Christian at the cabins, and now it was almost another holiday... another two week break was very close.

"Cody, I don't wanna do this." Christian groaned, looking down at the small two paragraph start.

I smiled at him, his face was absolutely the cutest, I lifted my hand to it, knocked some of his hair out of his eyes. It wasn't really long or really short.. Just perfect.

"We have to. Unless you want to fail."

"I can't fail! My mother would kill me!" He took the pen from my hand and started writing. I looked at the paper as he went on, filling it with words.

"I can write some of it you know..." I reminded him, shocked by how fast he was slapping words onto the paper. In fifteen minutes he had put the last period on and handed me the pen. Six beautiful paragraphs.

Wow.

So much for team work...

"Now. We're done. Relax." He told me, smiling his heart melting smile.

"Yeah, no thanks to me or anything." I said rolling my eyes at him.

He shoved my shoulder and I fell back against the side of my bed, caught off guard.

I laughed at his face. He was trying to put on some kind of tough face, he put his fists up. "Wanna fight?" He asked teasingly.

"Oh please, lets not embarrass yourself." I sit up, looking at him, still smiling no doubt.

He winked at me and sit with his legs in an Indian style position.

"So, are you excited for Christmas?" He asked me, rubbing his arms together, I could tell he was kinda cold.

"Of course." Was my obvious answer.

I got onto my knees and shoved him a bit too hard. He fell on his back and made a noise.

"Owed you that." I laughed, staring at his shocked face as he got onto his feet.

"Ohhh, you're getting it now mister."

I jumped up and grabbed a pillow from my bed, slamming it into him before he could tackle. He made a grunt like noise and jumped back a bit. He grabbed Zack's pillow and tried to hit me back, of course I was blocking him with my pillow. We were both laughing. Too loud. I was glad that mom was at work an that Zack was at Max's house. It was better that way. We could let loose.

Caught in my thoughts, he slammed me in the side with Zack's pillow. I fell backwards onto my bed and tried to roll over and get back up. Too late. He was fast.

He had already charged into me,keeping me on the bed. He held my two arms down beside me, straddling me, his butt hovering just above my... I tried not to think about it.

He smiled down at me as I fought hopelessly against his tight grip. I wasn't getting up. He was a lot stronger than I had thought. A lot stronger.

I groaned under him, trying to wiggle out. He smiled at me, but then his stare was more serious. We were looking into each others eyes. I stopped wiggling and laid there under him. He relaxed, letting go of my arms, sitting back so that his butt was actually touching my crotch. I tried not to think about it again. He wasn't too heavy. It was comfortable. It felt good.

My heart was beating at least 80 MPH. I felt myself losing oxygen. I was so nervous. I felt his hand go through my hair as he looked down.

His deep green eyes seemed to shine as he looked down at me, so glassy, beautiful. They were like another land, another planet. I could, did get lost in them as I laid there. Our breathing was heavy from our rough housing... Well mine was heavy from a little more than that.

Yours would be too if you were laying with a boy as hot as Christian setting on you. And no just on you, but on your...area. My face was blushing now. Ugh.

I didn't speak, I didn't want to ruin the moment. I just looked at him, his hand running through my hair, I froze as he began to lean down towards me, I didn't have to maintain my breathing, I had stopped. My heart sped up faster, if that was even possible. I was so nervous. My stomach had a billion butterfly's.

When his lips touched mine I felt like I was falling. Like I had just sky dived out of a plane and was falling for Earth. The thrill was so exciting. I wondered if he was enjoying as much as I was, probably not. I was sure to suck at it. My hand found his hair and I tangled my fingers in it.

His lips were electric. Magical. I tried to take a breath, but he kept kissing me, not that i was complaining. I felt like I was getting light headed. I was floating. Cloud nine right here.

He pulled up and looked down at me. The sound I made taking in a breath was a bit too loud. I knew I was blushing. He giggled at me. His face was so beautiful. I lifted my hand up to it and touched it. He grabbed my hand and held it against his chest. His heart was beating as fast as mine. I was surprised by this.

It was as if he knew I was wondering... Of course he had felt my heart beat. It shook my whole upper half, had too as fast as it was going. I felt embarrassed again.

I didn't know what to say. So I just smiled at him. I leaned up, having a bit of difficulty with him sitting on me, and kissed his stomach through his shirt. I propped myself up on my elbows. I was so happy. It was heaven. Here. Alone with the perfect boy. Literally. Perfect.

Suddenly I heard footsteps and the suite door slammed shut. Before Christian could get off me, Zack and Max burst into the room laughing, but their faces were swiped to nothing as they saw Christian hoping off of me. My face was red. Very red. I felt it burning there. I was so scared. So embarrassed.

They looked at us. We looked at them.

"What the hell?" Is the last thing I heard before Zack jumped at me...

* * *

A/N: I actually liked this chapter. So I'm hoping you guys do too. Keep reviewing and I'll keep writing. Thanks! xD


	13. Blizzard

Chapter Thirteen: Blizzard

The sharp pain in my nose told me immediately that Zack had broken it. I felt the blood flowing effortlessly down my face. Screaming, yelling. Zack being jerked off of me. More yelling.

I lay there, looking around me, but seeing nothing, thinking, my face burning, hurting. I leaned my head up and my senses returned to normal. Anger.

I jumped off of my bed and shoved Zack hard. He fell into the wall and to the floor. I kicked him in the chest, he grunted.

"Cody, no!" Max screamed jerking me away from Zack by my arm. "Stop it! Both of you! Stop!"

Silence.

Zack stood up, looking at me. I hadn't even hurt him, just surprised him.

"How could you?" I asked, my throat aching. I tried to fight the tears in my eyes, not wanting them to fall. "I thought you were starting to understand?"

Zack didn't respond. He went over to his bed and threw himself down on it.

Christian moved beside me, he was crying already. "Are you okay?" He asked, running a tissue under my bloody nose.

I didn't answer, just slapped his hand away.

"ZACK! I'M TALKING TO YOU!" I screamed, everyone jumped a little, even Zack.

"Why do you have to be a FAG!?" He screamed the rest word harshly.

Max and Christian sit down on my bed.

"I can't help it Zack. This is who I am."

"Well I don't like who you are. Change."

"Stop being so selfish. Think of it from my shoes! Just understand for once!" My tears finally tinkled over and fell down my face, mixing in the blood. The taste of blood still lingered on the back of my throat.

Zack didn't answer. More silence.

"I'm sorry."

For a minute I thought Christian had said it. Zack would never tell me sorry, would he? No, of course he wouldn't.

But he did. He did say sorry, and I saw regret in his eyes as he faced me. "Are you okay?" He asked me, standing in front of me.

I didn't know what to say. "Why the sudden mood change?"

"Because. I just stepped into your shoes. Christian is your Maddie isn't he?" Zack asked, looking towards him. His eyes weren't friendly. But they weren't harsh either.

"I guess so."

"Well, I wouldn't like it if you broke my nose for liking Maddie." He sit back down on the edge of his bed. "I was just shocked. It caught me off guard. He... he was on you." He looked up again.

"I didn't know you were coming home. I'm sorry. I wouldn't ever do that stuff in front of people. You should know that."

More silence.

"I hate fags Cody, they are gross. It's wrong." I saw Christian flinch at his words, getting mad. "But..."

"But?" I asked, trying to get it out of him before Christian went into some kind of anger fit. I knew he was tough.

"But you're my brother. So i'm going to try and... I'll try." He huffed.

Was I dreaming? From broken nose to trying in fifteen minutes? I must be dreaming...

But no, there was no dream. Zack really did apologize and he really did mean it. He would try.. whatever that meant.

--

The last few days of school flew by faster than I could have imagined. The snow was about four inches high and it was freezing outside. Freezing. And now two people knew about me and Christian. Max and Zack. Max thought it was the cutest thing ever, which did get annoying. She always wanted us to dress to match each other and she was just... weird. In a good way. I was glad that she accepted it.. Unlike some people, Zack. Christian had shied away from telling Jesse. I knew he would though. Soon.

Zack was getting better though. Even though I knew he hadn't really changed his view on it, he didn't call us Fags or give us rude looks anymore. And it had been just sixteen days. Big improvement.

My nose didn't hurt at all anymore. The doctor had told me it was just badly stoved, not broken. Well, I was sure of one thing. It hurt like nothing I had ever felt before. Owww. I didn't want to remember it. I was just glad it was finally its normal size again. Its normal color...

"Guess what today is?" Christian asked me, we were walking through the snow to his house. The snow flew wildly around us. White and very cold. We were tightly bound in our coats, only a small part of our faces showing, red from cold, our noses running. Gross.

"Uh.. December twenty-third?" I asked confused.

"Yeah." He smiled at me. Wanting me to go on. I didn't know what he was getting at.

"Tuesday?"

"Geez. Come on Cody." He sighed. "Today's a month. Since... you know. That day in the woods. When I showed you the song. That's when I started counting was as... well.. boyfriends."

I had never heard him refer to us as that before, it sounded nice coming from him. Today was our month. A month since we gotten together.. And it took him half a month to kiss me? I sighed. Half a month had been too long. And besides that, he hadn't kissed me since the first time. Ugh.

"Wow, I never realized that." I said dumbly. But truthfully, I hadn't.

Christian's mom was a nice person. She always had some kind of cookies made, offering them to me as soon as I walked in. Today was no different. The only difference now was that these cookies were shaped like Santa and Candy Canes. I smiled and took a Candy Cane. "Thank you." I told her, smiling.

"You're welcome dear." She said, sounding like a grandmother instead of just a mother.

I followed Christian upstairs to his room.

A mess. As usual.

He had clothes all over the place, his floor, dresser, bed. Everywhere. And his bed was never made. The gray sheets were wrinkled, used. Not made in weeks. There was a few empty coke cans next to his bed, and an open bag of pretzels, some of them on the floor.

"Clean your room." I told him, taking in the mess. I had to admit, it was very him. Cute.

"I did. It's very clean compared to usual. He said teasingly. "I have to go take the trash out for my mom. I'll be back in a few minutes, Okay?"

"Alright." I said sitting on the edge of his bed. "Hurry."

He smiled at me and darted out of the room. I looked around. Mess! You don't even understand. I laughed to myself.

I saw a a few pieces of paper under his black pillow. The whole gray and black thing was hot. I lifted the pillow up exposing about twenty pieces of paper, stuff printed from the internet.

I looked at them, and automatically blushed.

Pages of how to make your first kiss perfect. Printed about a week before he had kissed me. He had planned our kiss? I blushed.

When I lifted the pillow to put it back, a small green book fell out of his pillow case. Ugh.

Don't look I told myself. Curiosity killed the cat. Oh well, I wasn't a cat. I put the papers back under his pillow and opened the green book. A journal. I knew it. I smiled to myself as I skimmed the entry's. He was adorable. He talked about me in every entry, but then he talked about stuff like what he had seen on tv, what he felt like eat, just stuff that was cute.

I kept flipping through the small book. He started talking about what he wanted for Christmas.. what I had bought him wasn't on the list. of course. I sighed, oh well. I still hope he likes it.

Towards the end was an entry that made me blush so bad that my whole body most have turned red.

_December 17th, 2008_  
_Cody wasn't all the way dressed when he came out of his room today. And he knew I had been waiting on him, Zack had told him. Yet he walks out with no shirt on. Doesn't he understand how hot he is? He must enjoy teasing me. He has the most flawless skin. His upper half is so amazing, I can't even begin to imagine how sexy his bottom half his..._

I shut the book and threw it into the pillow case. I was so embarrassed. From now on I would wear three shirts when he came over! Ugh. I felt the red staying on my cheeks. I just wanted to be gone. Why did I have to snoop? This was embarrassing.

Outside, the snow was falling more than ever. Seriously, it made me forget my embarrassment as I made my way to the window. Was there already another inch out there since we had gotten to Christian's? I couldn't even see our footprints anymore. This worried me a little. I didn't want Christian's mom to have to drive me home, but it was getting deeeep. I would wear myself out walking through that.

"It's snowing like a beast out there." Christian's voice spooked me, and I turned around.

He had white snowflakes in his hair, as he smiled back at me. "I washed my hands." He smiled.

"I don't know if I should stay. I want to be able to walk home. And there's already four inches." I looked back out of the window.

"Hun, you aren't going anywhere while it's a blizzard outside." He said wrapping his arms around me from behind. Something else he didn't usually do. I closed my eyes and leaned back against him. He was so cold from being outside. I got goosebumps as my warm body touched his. "You are warm." He said comfortably.

I turned around and looked at his eyes. He was taller than me. I loved that.

He leaned down and kissed my head, pulling me against him into a tight hug. My arms wrapped around him, my face at the bottom of his neck. He smelled so good. Like I can't describe it. It was really attractive though. Everything about him was.

The snow kept falling. More and more by the hour. After two hours of talking and playing around we went downstairs to see how much snow we had accumulated.

"We have about six inches now." Christian's mom told us as we entered the room. She had the weather channel on.

"Cody, you should call your mom and tell her you are staying tonight. I'm sure Christian can let you borrow some clothes. It'd be dangerous to go out in this." His mom told me, smiling sweetly. She was such a nice lady.

Outside, the snow continued to fall. Christian eagerly handed me the phone, appearing with it from the kitchen.

No way, staying at Christian's? Okay, pinch me, I am dreaming.

My heard was in flutters as I dialed my own number.

"Hello?" I heard my mother ask from the other end.

"Christian's mom thinks I should stay tonight. See if the snow let's up. She says it might be too dangerous to go out it. Is that okay?" I tried not to sound eager, but I knew I did. I waited for her response.

"I think she might be right Cody, will you be alright?" She asked, the pause must have been her walking over to the window and looking out it.

"I'll be perfect mom. Love you." I didn't wait for her reply before I pushed the end button.

Oh my god. I was staying at his house! Okay, so maybe it's not a big deal. But hey, it's our first sleepover other than the cabins, so i'm excited. And nervous. A cold night alone with Christian?

My heart was fluttering. But that wasn't really a surprise. It hadn't stopped since he had sit with me at lunch all that time ago.

The blizzard outside continued.

* * *

A/N: Yeah alot of things happened this chapter. Hopefully, you don't feel too rushed. I just didn't want to go through all the school and stuff. it's boring. . haha. Thanks for reviewing. Please continue! Rawr, I got cold writing this chapter. Winter. . haha. Review please! Thanks!


	14. Oh No!

Chapter Fourteen: Oh No!

I dipped my grilled cheese into the tomato soup and took a bite. It was delicious! And warm. It was still snowing outside, three hours later. I didn't mind though. There was no where else I'd rather be. We finished eating and went back up to Christian's room. I sit on his computer chair and he sit on the end of his bed.

"Whattcha wanna do?" I asked, twirling around a few times.

"Well we could go outside, if it wasn't snowing so hard." He rolled his eyes and we both looked out of the window. It was almost 8pm now anyway.

I found his tv remote under a bunch of paper and flipped on the tv. It was loud with buzzing, the white and black scratchy screen was too bright. I flipped it off quickly.

"Dad hasn't hooked up my cable yet. But we can watch movies." Christian said pointing to a shelf full of DVDs. He had a pretty big collection.

I sighed and saw a radio on a shelf next his DVD stand. I went over and flipped it on.

Disturbia. By Rihanna.

"That's a cool song." Christian sighed. "The video is BRILLIANT!"

"Brilliant? The video gave me nightmares. It's creepy." I said, looking at him strangely. Seriously, she was demonic in it, wtf? I mean the song was good, but the video scared me. It seriously did.

"So, wanna play truth or dare?" Christian asked, bouncing around on his bed, trying to not make it obvious that he was dancing along to a Rihanna song. Dork.

"Sure, truth or dare.?"

"Dare." He smiled wryly.

"I dare you to..." I didn't know what to dare him to do. I was bad at this game. I wish I would have noticed that.

"I dare you to kiss me." He cut in smiling, a bit of nervous in his eyes. Why was he nervous? I was the uglier of the two, why didn't he realize that?

I smiled back at him and got off the chair. I sit down next to him on the bed and put my hand on his head, running it through his hair, I was leaning in about to kiss him when - "Christian!?"

I jumped backwards and looked towards the door. Kristen. She hadn't seen anything. Thank God.

"Christian, where is the monopoly game?" She asked, her arms touching each side of his door frame. "Me and mom are gonna play while we wait for dad to call. You two can play if you want?"

"Nah, we're gonna settle in for tonight." He said, on the floor now, his left arm stretched under his bed. He retrieved the monopoly game and handed it to Kristen.

"Thanks." She smiled and flew from the door. Why was she always so cheery? Hmm.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the door locking.

"Isn't that suspicious?" I asked, shock written on my face.

"Nah, everyone in this house locks their bedroom door when they're asleep. It's a habit for us." He said, taking his seat on the bed.

Wow, was I dreaming? No one could walk in on us. That was good. I had almost gotten caught just now. Ugh.

"So where was we?" He said, leaning into me, and for the second time, his lips touched mine, the taste of spearmint on his breath, it was good. I kissed at the scent, becoming more aggressive, my heart speeding up, as usual. I felt him press against me, pushing me backwards onto his bed, he climbed onto me, kissing me harder, his breathing stayed normal. How? I had no idea. My head was in a thousand didn't places, and my breathing was noticeably harder.

Without thinking I bit down on his bottom lip, a bit too hard. He pulled back surprised. After a second he ran his finger along the inside of his lip and looked at it. Blood.

Wow, this was embarrassing. "I'm sorry." I said uncomfortably under him.

"Don't be, that's hot Cody."

I didn't have time to reply before he was leaned down kissing me again, the faint taste of blood in our mouths. I should be grossed out, but I wasn't.

He pulled back, but only a little, kissing the side of my face and down my neck to the collar of my shirt, biting on me gently, then harder, then a little to hard. "Owww." It slipped without my permission.

He pulled back faster than last time. He was completely off the bed. "I'm sorry! I hurt you, I'm sorry Cody."

I was embarrassed again. I kept ruining out moments. "No, it's okay. I didn't mean to say that." I said, throwing a smile at him. I could tell he felt bad.

"Let's watch a movie." He said walking over to the collection of movies beside the bed, against the other wall.

Damn. I was really enjoying that.

He put in some dark comedy that I had never heard of. The previews started.

"I'm gonna go put my pajamas on in the bathroom. You can change in here while I'm gone." He said grabbing a bundle of clothes and throwing them too me. He grabbed another pile and disappeared out the door, shutting it behind him. I quickly stripped my clothes off, immediately getting goosebumps from cold all over my body. The house was warm when you were in close, but yeah. I slipped the flannel bottoms on and pulled the white t-shirt over my head. it was comfortable.

A few minutes later Christian appeared in the same thing. Except that his bottoms were green, mine were blue. He locked the door, pushed play on the movie and jumped onto the bed next to me. He grabbed the bag of pretzels off the floor and offered me one. I took one, and was shocked that they actually tasted good. I laughed.

"What?" He asked smiling at me, chewing on a couple pretzels.

"Nothing." I laughed as the title of the movie came up on the screen. He reached over by his bed and switched the light off, letting the tv light the room.

I laid down in front of him, trying to get into the movie. But I had to admit, it was rather boring with a hottie like Christian having his arm around your waist behind you. He stayed close, giving me a feeling of warmth, his lips gently pressed against my neck every now and then as if to kiss it better from earlier. I smiled, not that he could see it.

I don't remember falling asleep, but I'm guessing that I did. Because I was woken suddenly the next morning.

"CRAP! NO!" I heard him scream. My eyes fluttered open tiredly, looking around for him. My eyes found him at the foot of the bed, his hands in his hair, looking scared and mad at the same time.

"What's wrong?" I ask, worry feeling my body now. He stood there looking at me.

"I'm sorry." He said, his voice was like a funeral song or something. Too over dramatic. What was he talking about?

"No!" He screamed again.

He sit on the end of the bed, his head in his hands. "We're in trouble." He mumbled. "Look in the mirror." He tossed me a hand held mirror. It hit my knee and I picked it up.

I looked into it. I didn't see anything... at first.

Then I saw it. On the side of my neck. He had bit me too hard. Way too hard.

The small blueish brown mark on my neck told me.

My first hickey.

Oh no. How do I hide that?

Crap.

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A/N: Thanks for reviewing guys. I Looooove getting reviews from you. xD Okay, this is the new chapter. Hope you like it.


	15. Getting Excited

Chapter Fifteen: Getting Excited

Thank god for the turtle neck in the back of Christian's closet. Even if it was a bit too short... and the ugliest color of green I had ever seen.

The hickey was hidden, that's what mattered.Outside the snow was resting, but it was pretty deep.

We had breakfast, and if anyone noticed the shortness of the shirt I was wearing, they didn't mention it.

"It's Christmas Eve, I need to get home somehow today." I told Christian as I was putting my other clothes into a bag.

"How are you supposed to get home in that? I don't think you're gonna make it, Cody."

"We've never been split up for Christmas. And dad comes in. I have to." I said, feeling a bit sad, I hadn't saw dad for eight months. He was always on the road, never having time to stop, or skip a state and come over this way. But he always made it on Christmas.

"I'm gonna bet his flight is delayed. There's no way you'll get through this snow Cody! Look out there!" Christian pointed his finger towards the window in his bedroom. I put my shirt in the bag and turned to him.

"I won't be annoying to your mom if I have to stay, right?" I sit on his bed, the bag made a noise.

"Of course not, my family loves you." He smiled at me, and sit down next to me, hugging me, leaving a kiss on my head.

"Would they love me if they saw this?" I asked, pulling my shirt collar down to expose the mark he had left.

He didn't say anything. I hope I didn't make him feel bad again, that's not what I meant to do. I didn't even know why I said it. I just wanted us to be accepted, but I knew we wouldn't be. Not by his family, obviously not by mine. Not by school. We were so taboo. We might corrupt someones kid with our disease. I groaned and tried to forget it.

"On a happier note, we finally slept together." I hit into his shoulder and we laughed.

"You suck in bed. You just laid there all night." He said teasingly, the atmosphere was happier now. We laughed.

"So if I'm not leaving, what do you want to do?"

"Well my mom called your mom, so that's done. Um, I'm going to take a shower, then you can. Warm up." He said going through his clothes.

"I hate this shirt!" I told him smiling.

"Stop getting bit then." He winked at me and left with his clothes.

NO snooping this time. That's what I told myself. I flipped on the radio and danced around the room. It's what you do when you're bored right? Yes.

Everything around me was perfect. I had the perfect boyfriend and I was Stuck with him! Stuck. It was heaven.

In what seemed like ten minutes, he appeared in the door, looking so hot. His hair was wet, just shook out, not combed yet, his shirt was wet in a few spots. He had a pair of blue jeans and a green short sleeve hollister shirt on. I wanted to jump on him right there. Hott. But I just blushed at my thoughts as usual, and started for the bathroom. "I hope you didn't run all the hot water out."

"You don't need hot water, it would turn hot when it hit you, even if it was cold."

We stared at each other for a second and I laughed at him. I saw him blush, that was rare, he must have realized how sucky that line was. I laughed again on my way to the bathroom. He was the cutest.

I shut the door and looked around. Their bathroom was cute. Done in blue. Medium blue walls, cool looking soap on the white marbled sink. There was a cool exotic looking rug covering the floor. It was like nine different colors.

I slipped my clothes off and started the shower. The hot water was amazing. It felt so good on my cold skin, I just stood there for what seemed like an hour. But then I realized there was a lot of people in the house and I washed myself and turned the water off.I stepped out and started drying myself off. The towel was purple and black and I realized that it was a Jack Skellington towel. It must have been Christian's. That was cute.

I put my clothes back on and started walking towards Christian's room. I peaked through the door and then put my whole body in, smiling. He was sitting on his bed, eating pretzels, he stood up when I came in. "Hey." He said, speaking with pretzels in his mouth. Some of them blew from his mouth. He walked over to me and gave me a hug. My wet head leaned against his chest.

He pulled back and then leaned down slightly and kissed me. And again.

My hand traveled down his back and onto his butt before I knew what I was doing, he continued to kiss me and grabbed my butt harder, pulling me into him, closer. He never let go of my butt as he continued kissing me. He gripped it harder, my body against his. My hand came up his back, and ran through his wet hair, he smelled so good. He kissed down my neck, releasing his grip on my butt, his hand going up under my shirt, holding my back as he kissed me. I felt myself.. getting excited. If you know what I mean.

"Oh." Christian said, noticing.

"I'm sorry." I said, I blushed and sit on his bed, grabbing a pillow. It wasn't fully up, but gosh, why was I always making things awkward.

"I don't mind." Christian said smiling.

"It's embarrassing. It was just kissing."

Christian sit down on the computer chair and grinned at me. "You're so cute. For real, you are."

I didn't say anything. He was the cute one. If I was, he'd be the one getting a hard on, not me.

I felt normal again, so I threw the pillow off of me and stood up, staring out of the window. Snow. Snow. Snow.

"Wanna build a snowman?" Christian asked from behind me.

Hmm. That might be fun. Me and Zack used to do that when we were younger.

"Yeah, let's do it."

I turned back and kissed him, only once, and then headed for his door before I even had the slightest chance of getting excited.. again.

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A/N: Sorry about the small pause. I've had a busy couple of days. . But THANKS for reviewing. Please continue.


	16. The Snowman

Chapter Sixteen: The Snowman

The snow was the brightest white I have ever seen, squinting was necessary. We had a huge snowball created for the bottom of the snowman. We were now making the second ball.

we were both cluttered into huge snow coats and winter boots. We probably looked extremely goofy, but hey, we were warm... kind of.

So, anyway, we were both pushing this rather large snowball around the yard, collecting the great white substance, the ball getting larger and larger. I dunno what we looked like trying to lift the second ball onto the first, but i knew it had too look funny because I could feel the strain in my back, it was heavy. we both grunted as we set the huge snowball down on the first.

"Now we just need the head." Christian said, his cheeks red from cold.

"You start the head and i'll go break some tree limbs off for arms."

I went out behind Christian's house and broke two tree limbs off a tree, a pile of snow following off the tree and onto my head. The snow frightened me and I jumped, biting my tongue. Ouch. I looked around the snow filled back yard, having trouble walking through the seven inch snow. I didn't even see the road anymore. I didn't know when I'd get home. But for some reason, I was okay here. With Christian. I was happy.

On the back porch I saw a small bag filled with gravel. I walked onto the porch and stomped my boots off, the small, freezing white snow flying off my boots. I grabbed the bag of gravel and started back for the front of the house, taking extra big steps through the deep snow. It was stomped down a lot in the front from where we had trotted around making the snowman. Christian was rounding the head off now, making it smooth and round.

It looked like a snowman, without arms and a face though.

While I was making a smiled out of the gravel's, Christian stuck the limps out as arms, one arm longer than the other. I put a gravel in the nose spot, and then two for eyes. Done.

We stepped back and looked at our masterpiece. It was pretty good.

"It's really good." I said, shivering, everything around us was covered in white.

"She's a hottie." Christian laughed, then ran over to it and hugged it. It was cute.

"Come on loser." I said walking towards the house. "I'm freezing my butt off!"

I heard him whisper something to himself, but thought it better not to ask what.

Inside, the air was toasty and warm. My pink cheeks tingled as the heat hit them. I pulled the huge boots and coat, hanging the coat next to Christian's on the coat rack. We walked into the living room where his mom and sister was, probably waiting for his dad to call. He hadn't been able to come home.

We sit next to the fireplace and Kristen brought us a cup of hot chocolate each. We sipped at it and warmed up, relaxing. It felt really holidayish in Christian's house. It smelled of cookies and candy canes, it was nice.

Kristen and Christian's mom went into the kitchen to start dinner while me and Christian moved onto the couch, setting our cups on the coffee table, sitting cross- legged on the couch.

"I've not had so much fun in forever. I really like being here with you." I said, watching the small marshmellows float in the cup.

"I love when you're here. You're my favorite person." He said grabbing my hands. His mom and sister was two rooms over, he was risking us. I pulled my hands back.

"Don't worry, they take their cooking very seriously. We're safe." He smiled, grabbing my cold hands. His were delightfully warm. Soothing.

I gripped his back.

We sat there for a while, just holding each other's hands, then I pulled mine back and got my cup of hot chocolate, holding it to my lips and taking a drink. It was rich, creamy, goodness.

Later that night we ate, and me and Christian headed upstairs.

"Tomorrow's Christmas." He said, pulling his pants off in his room, tossing them to the corner. I turned around. Now he was changing in front of me?

"You can watch." He offered, I heard his shirt hit the floor. I blushed. "I'm not getting completely naked silly." I felt him hug me from behind, slipping his arms around me, his head leaning into my neck.

He smelled sooooo good. I sighed and turned to face him.

Flawless.

His skin was silky smooth, and tan. A tan line started just above the top of his boxers. His happy trail was hot, disappearing into the boxers, just as it had the last time I had saw it on the camping trip. His legs were long, and strong, not too hairy. Barely hairy. Very hot.

I shook the thoughts. "Get you're clothes on." I said, poking him in the shoulder.

"Make me." He whispered down at me, moving closer. He kissed me, then smiled and turned around, grabbing his Pajama bottoms and pulling them on.

He was incredibly irresistible. I wanted him in more ways than I had him. I wanted that next step. More than kissing and hugging. I blushed again, and grabbed my clothes, heading to the bathroom to change. I knew it was normal to have those thoughts, but it was still embarrassing.

I dunno why I find that subject so embarrassing, I just do.

Should I be ready so soon? After just over a month? I had known him for a long time. Did that count? Or was he even ready? I don't know.

I got changed and headed back for the room.

Tonight would be just as amazing as last night. Because I would be in the arms of my Christian. My Romeo.

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A/N: Christian and Cody didn't have sex. No. That was just a joke from Cody. They have only slept in the same bed. lol. I hope you guys like the chapter. I know I usually don't update this fast, but I just felt like writing another one. haha. please review! 


	17. Christmas Day

Chapter Seventeen: Christmas Day

CHRISTMAS DAY!

I walked out of Christian's bedroom with bed hair and the same ugly green turtle necked shirt. The hickey didn't even show signs of leaving. I was almost to the bed room when Kristen yanked me into her room.She grabbed my shirt by the bottom and started to lift it up, but I stopped her, pulling away.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I struggled, finally freeing myself from her.

"Do you want to hide that hickey or not?" She asked, her hands on her hips, her lips shiny. She looked like she'd been ready for today for a few hours now. A small candy cane colored dress, her blonde hair colored, lips shining from gloss. She was so pretty.

"What do you mean?" I asked dumbly, my heart sped up, and I felt sweat running down the beck of my neck.

"Come on Cody, I'm a girl, I used to hide them too. I know why you're still wearing that shirt. Makeup will hide it good with regular shirts. Just let me do it." She said grabbing the bottom of my shirt. I didn't know what to say. She pulled my shirt off and looked at it. Ouch. He really got you. She laughed to herself. I felt myself blushing.

"How'd you know?"

"I didn't. But obviously you two are more than friends. I can tell. Just look at the way you stare at each other. It's so cute. And then the turtle neck. That's all I needed to know." She said grabbing some kind of makeup sponge from her dresser and patting my neck.

"We're obvious?" I asked, getting more and more embarrassed. I couldn't believe I was shirtless in front of her.

"Very." She kept patting the makeup on my neck. I hoped it looked natural. "But no worries, mom is clueless."

She stopped and smiled. "Can't even see it."

I looked in her full length mirror, shocked. My hickey was gone. Why hadn't I thought of this.

"So..." She started, waiting for me to add something. I didn't know what.

"So... what?" I asked, starting to put the shirt over my head.

She grabbed it and threw it down. "You'll mess up the makeup with that turtle neck, silly." She said, "Anyway, have you guys.. You know, done anything more than kiss?"

Oh my god.

Was this for real? My cheeks had to be burning red, I was so embarrassed, I felt my throat getting dryer. "No." I squeaked out, turning for the door. "Thank You." I managed as I turned the knob.

"Any time."

I closed her door and leaned against it. What had just happened.

I went back to Christian's room, only to realize he was in the bathroom changing. Quickly I changed into some of his clothes, and sighed. It was great being in short sleeve's again. No annoying long neck thingy either. Ahh.

I walked downstairs with Kristen and saw no presents. I looked at her and as if she knew what I were thinking, she answered. "We're waiting for dad to come home." I muttered "oh" in silence, and looked towards the kitchen. Something smelled AMAZING. Ham... baked beans, some corn, was that green bean casserole. A bunch of different smells, so delicious.

Christian appeared behind me and smiled, I felt weird and Kristen winked at me disappearing into the kitchen.

"Where's the hickey?" Christian asked, his face full of confusion now.

"Your sister. She knows! She put some kind of makeup on my neck, and now you can't even see it, and like -"

"Wait. Wait. WAIT. She knows?" Christian asked, somewhere between a panic and freaking out.

"Christian, calm down. Stop!" I said grabbing his hands, his breathing was irregular, he looked at me, shaking slightly.

"She's okay with it hun, she's good. Don't worry." I said, my hand running through his hair.

"She doesn't mind?" He asked, I heard the relief in his voice.

"No, she was... excited, I think."

He looked at me surprised, but clearly relieved. We were silent for a bit. Kristen re-entered the room.

We never talked about what we were thinking, but I all knew it was the same thing. Me and Christian. Being together. Awkward.

Dinner was delicious. Christian's mom was an amazing cook in all meanings of the word, whereas mine sucked, to be brutally honest. I was so glad I was stuck here. I just wished their dad would have made it. I could tell that their family was brutally close.

It was on the edge of dark and small snow flurries filled the air, not as hard as the past few days.

I stood over the sink, listening to the water fill it, soap bubbles plopping inside. The smell of tangerines filled my nostrils. Mmm.

Me and Kristen were washing and drying tonight. I was drying.

"So, how long?" She asked, handing me a plate, I stuck it under the water and put it into the dish washer.

"A bit over a month." I said, starting to feel more comfortable around her. She wasn't so bad.

We continued our cycle as we discussed stuff. Me and Christian, snow, Christmas. What would happen for the New Year. How far I'd gone with Christian. I didn't become embarrassed, with an exception to that last thing. She was actually pretty cool, and I knew I could trust her.

It felt nice, having someone to talk to other than Christian. I really didn't feel comfortable with it around Zack. Not at all.

We finished the dishes and went into the living room. Their mom was in bed and Christian had it on the Christmas cartoon marathon. I sat down next to him and she set across the room in a chair.

I laid my head on his shoulder and sighed. Long day. I felt comfortable around Kristen, but I could sense that he was still uneasy about it.

He tugged on my arm and got up, wanting me to follow him. I did. We went into his room and he shut the door.

"I have something for you." He said smiling.

Oh no. My present for him was at home. No, no , no.

"Wait, Yours from me is at home though."

"It's okay, I can't wait to give it to you any longer." He said grabbing a box from the top of his closet. It was small, gold wrapped with a yellow ribbon and bow tying it shut.

I smiled at him and pulled the bow off. I lifted the top off the box and inside was a necklace. It was just like his weird one made of rocks. The one he wore to school all the time. The rocks were different sizes and shapes, the colors also had small differences. It's not something I would usually wear, but now I felt closer to him. Like he was giving a piece of himself to me.

"I hope you like it. I thought if we both had one, it'd kind of connect us in a way. Or something..." He left the words fade and looked around.

"I do like it! It's cute." I said happily, giving him a hug, he hugged me back tightly.

"Thank you." I said releasing him. He shook his head, and leaned in to kiss me. I kissed him back, his tongue in my mouth, mine in his. He kissed down my chin, onto my neck, kissing down it to my shirt collar. Tugging the collar of my shirt with his teeth. Before I could say anything, he had taken my shirt off, his lips on my lips again, before moving onto my chest, kissing it, biting me gently next to my nipple.

My head was a whirlwind. I couldn't believe how amazing this was. He was so good. It was hard to believe this was the first time he'd done all of this. My heart was beating faster under his mouth, under my skin.

I felt him kissing me lower. At my belly button now, as he begin kissing down my happy trail I felt the strange feeling in my pants. The one that meant I was getting excited again. His teeth started pulling on top of my pants and I grabbed his head. "Wait." I said, he lifted his head.

What was I doing? What the eff? I wanted this didn't I?

"Nevermind, sorry. Go ahead." I said, laying back again, I felt him kissing below my belly button again, tugging at my pants zipper with his teeth, I felt myself growing in my pants, my thinking becoming harder to control, I only wanted one thing. Him. Now. Forever. A small moan left my throat, exiting through my mouth.

He pulled the zipper down faster, with his teeth, now unbuttoning my pants. No. I couldn't do this now. Could I? No. Ugh.

"Wait." I said again, he looked up at me with a weird expression, and I knew he wanted me as much as I wanted him. Why? I didn't know, but he did.

"What happened?" He asked, confused, I leaned up on my elbows and looked at him. For some reason, the hard on in my pants didn't bother me this time. I pulled myself up and grabbed a pillow anyway.

"I'm sorry. Just.. not yet." I said, fighting with a voice in my head telling me to get my pants off NOW. I sighed. I thought I wanted this. I did want this. Just.. not now. Not at this moment. It didn't feel right.

"It's okay, I just wanna make you happy. In every way." He said, smiling, kissing me, his arm around me. Ugh, he was making this so hard to resist. I pulled back.

"And you will. When the times right. You do make me happy." I kissed his head and buttoned my pants back, zipping them. He groaned.

"I'm sorry." I told him, laughing a bit.

"I bet you are." He said smiling at me, kissing my lips again. Again, and then one more time. Three quick cute ones, I felt myself returning to normal in my pants as we laid down together, flipping the light off. I heard the gold box fall to the floor. I must have kicked it by accident.

I smiled happily in his arms. He was so warm that I never even noticed that I was without my shirt still.

I fell asleep with him, listening to Frosty the Snowman from downstairs.

It was a Merry Christmas. We'd see about the New Year soon...

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A/N: STUPID school starts next week. . Ugh. lol. PLEASE Review guys! Thanks.


	18. Baby New Year

Chapter Eighteen: Baby New Year

I opened my eyes, Zack was asleep across the room. It was so weird seeing him again. I had gotten used to being at Christian's.. I kind of missed it.

Zack had been very different lately, almost depressed. I had been home for four days. He never left the house. Ever. He was in bed like 24/7 now and to be honest, I don't understand why.

I was able to give Christian his present. I had made him a bracelet that matched his necklace. Thank god he liked it. I sucked at making stuff.

Welcome to New Years eve, it's been quiet busy. There is a party in the Tipton Ball Room today and I had invited Christian to come.

I rolled out of bed and looked out of the window. Another cold, snow covered day in Boston. I sighed and smiled as I turned around.

I flinched, Zack's blood shot eyes stared back into mine. His face was drawn in lines, his mouth shaped as a frown. His eyes were empty. His soul was... gone. What had happened to him?

"Zack?"

He never answered. Just stared at me. His expression so grave it frightened me. He slowly laid his upper body back onto the bed and turned away from me, pulling the covers over his head. This wasn't like him.

I slowly approached his bed and sat on the corner of it. I let my arm extend and touch his side softly. "Zack?" I said again, only a whispers. He jerked away from me and make a growl like sound.

I frowned as I stood up. Maybe he would tell me later?

I got dressed and fooled around for most of the day. Making sure I looked my best. I was wearing a red Aeropostale shirt and blue jeans. I wore the necklace from Christian around my neck. I hadn't taken it off since I had received it.

At 8:00PM, Christian's soft knock sounded on my door. I answered and gave him a quick peck on the lips in case Zack happened to be coming out for a bathroom break. Christian wore a tight Nightmare Before Christmas shirt and slightly tight pants. He looked hot, but not emo, you know? Despite the fact that Zack had tried his best to look good for tonight, he looked like crap. Scared even? It was starting to freak me out.

Me and Christian were popping jelly beans in our mouths when we heard another knock at the door. Max.

Now you'd think with it being Max and all that she'd be happy and cheerful and such? Well no... She was worse than Zack. Yes, I said worse. She never spoke as she moped through the door and into Zack's arm, they had a fake smile and kissed each other. They'd been dating for about a week now. But I always felt like they had always liked each other.

I looked at Christian and decided not to bother Zack and Max. We started down to the party at 9. Even though it had started at 6.

The room was very sparkly. Huge 2009's were everywhere. It was very... Interesting so to say. Very bright and fun. Lights of every color flashed around the room. Soda and Peanuts were on almost every surface. There was beer too of course, but I saw Moseby lurking, making sure no kids got into it. The music was upbeat and fun. I felt my foot tapping the floor.

Naturally the night flew by. And it was hard keeping it strictly friends between me and Christian, but we managed. Barely. You know how when 12 hits you kiss the one you love? Well how would I do that? You may think I wouldn't have thought about it, but believe me I did. Just before midnight I pulled Christian back into the darkest part of the room, where no one was looking and I waited for that clock to strike midnight.

Within just a few minutes, screams in the room erupted.

"3...2...1.. HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

Christian grabbed my head and kissed me for what seemed like only three seconds.Then it was over. A weird sound came from up front and people "Ewwed" at it.

Oh great, someone had drank too much. I made a disgusted face and turned to the source of the interruption.

I was shocked to see.. a kid on the floor. On his knees, blonde hair, longish... Zack? What?

I started for the front of the room only to see that Max had been the one to throw up, she was wiping her mouth off when I approached, dry heaves leaving her throat. I saw tears in Zack's eyes and when he saw me, he ran.

"Stay with her." I told Christian, running after Zack, the whole room staring at us. The foolish kids.

Zack was faster than I had ever given him credit for. He beat me to the suite by like twenty seconds at least.

He had not shut the door when he entered, so I did as I started towards our room. The small click was nothing in my ear. I slowly went into our room, only the light from the living room showing me the clear path to his bed. I heard his heavy sobs, and felt my heart drop. What had happened to him? I felt my own tears building up.

I didn't know what to say, so I got into his bed and laid down beside him, letting my arm fall around him, hugging him from behind. I felt his tear wet hand grip mine feebly. I felt a tear fall from my eye. Why was my brother hurting this bad? "Zack? What happened?"

"We had sex Cody." He said, sniffling.

"That's okay Zack, if you love her. You guys have known each other for a long time. Why are you sad? I thought it was cool to lose your virginity at your age?"

The words he said next were choked out in sobs, sounding both sad and scared.

"Cody. We didn't have a condom."

I stopped breathing. In that moment I grew up more than I ever had in my life. In that moment I knew everything would change. In that moment I became and uncle.

And Zack became a dad.

* * *

A/N- Sorry for my slow poke updates. I have school and work taking me down. . But I do hope you guys like where I'm going with this. I wanted to make sure it wasn't just Cody/Christian ALL the time, but never fear, there shall be tons of them in every chapter. Good and bad. xD Thanks for reviewing! PLEASE continue. Let me know what you think.


	19. Ready or Not

Chapter Nineteen: Ready or Not

I shut my locker and turned down the left hallway towards my English class. Kids were cluttered together, talking a little too loudly as they tried to reach their next class before a tardy bell rang. I entered the class and took my normal seat next to Christian. I shoved my books under the desk chair and sighed.

"Are you ready for the quiz?" He asked me, smiling, his teeth were so white.

"Mhm." I muttered, not really listening. His face was so perfect in every single way.

But most of all, I had a lot on my mind. Max was pregnant. Thirteen weeks to be exact. Zack had only known for about 2 weeks though, Max had been afraid to tell him. Afraid he would leave her or hate her or whatever. Over three months and she hadn't told anyone. She didn't even have a noticeable bump. You know?

I was still wrapping my head around this, it was almost impossible to believe. Zack. Sex. Max. Pregnancy. So Surreal.

Then there was my own life. Christian. Gay. Love.

Yeah, I came to the conclusion that I loved him. I really, really did. He meant so much to me. Speaking of which, the hickey was finally faded away now. And I hadn't let him bite me since, on the neck anyway...

Not that we had ever gone farther than making out. But hey, that was okay for now. I was happy with him. The way we were.

"Everyone clear your desks except for a sheet of paper. Please put your name on it, and number it one to fifteen." The teacher said, handing out a hand out test. "Do not write on my tests and do not talk or you will receive a zero and your test."

I numbered my paper and began the test. It was kind of tough, but it wasn't bad I guess. Not as bad as Zack's problem. Not nearly.

I finally finished the test and the teacher collected them at the end of class.

"That was fairly easy." I told Christian, smiling at him. He was a cutie.

"I know. I actually agree this time." I could tell easily by his expression that in truth, it really had been easier for him. More proof that I had let everything slip.

The bell rang and he followed me to the bathroom down by Mr. Farley's room. No one ever used this one, so we snuck in every now and then to have a kiss. He pushed me backwards into the wall and gave me a kiss, I grabbed the back of his head pulling it closer to mine. If that were possible.

"Baseball season starts next week." Christian said pulling back. "You're gonna look so hot in that uniform." He was still not good at hiding when he blushed, it was cute.

To be honest, I hadn't thought of baseball too much. But he was right. It started next week.

I smiled at him and grabbed him , taking him in a hug.

"Cody?"

"Yeah?" I asked, pressing my head against the top of his shoulder.

"What's wrong? You're so different than you were before you ran after Zack. Is everything okay?" His words were made of concern. Built on curiosity. What do I do? Lie? Tell the truth?

"Christian.. It's nothing." I said, pecking him on the lips, not letting go of him.

"Cody, don't you trust me?" He asked, and he was serious. How could he be serious? Of course I trusted him. More than anything. But was it my spot to tell him. Would Zack care? Max?

I pulled back and sighed, rubbing my fingers in my eyes. I looked up at his perfect face. His feathery blonde hair. So cute, hot, sexy, gorgeous... but worried. About Zack and me, I knew. I had to tell him. I had to.

"Cody, it's alright, just tell me." He encouraged, his voice was gentle.

"Zack and Max had sex." I said, waiting for his reaction.

"Okay..." He said slowly, looking confused. "So?"

"He never wore a condom."

Christian flinched and jumped back a few inches. "No way Cody. No freakin' way."

I saw sweat break on his forehead.

"Christian, are you okay?"

"That's so... he's 16! She's 16! They'll only be 16!" Christian said babbling, trying to take grasp onto what he was hearing.

"Is this a joke?" He asked me, shocked more than I had thought he would be.

"No Christian. They're really having a baby. It's for real."

The words seemed fake as I said them aloud. Zack and Max having a baby? No way. Christian was right. it sounded like some kind of sick, cruel, bad joke. But it wasn't. They were pregnant and it was all very real. Making them both sick. Changing their lives forever.

"Wow." He said, then he turned, and exited the bathroom.

I had given him a lot to think about. But later that night, he called me of course, as if the whole bathroom thing never even happened and he didn't even know Max was with child.

I talked to him for a while then hung up and headed into the bedroom.

As I entered Zack shoved a book under his cover and looked up startled. He sighed when he saw me. Relief.

"I thought you were mom." He said, pulling the book out again, allowing me to see the cover. 'What To Expect When Your Expecting.' How original. It was still so weird looking at Zack and knowing that he had sexed someone, let alone gotten her pregnant.

"Nah, just me." I said, jumping onto my bed. I would have joined him, asked questions and etc, but I didn't want to intrude or make him uncomfortable.

He never said anything else, and I personally dozed off pretty quick. The bed so soft, my body falling into it. It felt like the middle of it was sinking in, even though I was positive that it wasn't.

My world wasn't turning right now. All I could think about was Zack. How I could help him. How I could be there when he needed someone.

What happens when mom finds out? Max's parents? The school?

A baby at 16 was no joke. It is one of those things that you that you think will never happen to you. Ever.

But it was happening to Zack and there was nothing he could do to stop it now.

The night was peaceful. Still. Quiet.

6 more months, and it wouldn't be anymore.

6 more months and that baby would be here.

Ready or not, here it comes.

* * *

A/N: YAY. Positive reviews. I'm glad you guys don't hate it. Thanks.


	20. Almost There

Chapter Twenty: Almost There

I threw my back pack off in Christian's chair when I entered his house. His mom and dad were on a trip in Florida right now, so we would be able to spend some time alone today.

"My mom made cookies the other day. Do you want some?" He asked me, getting himself one.

"Nah, not right now." I told him, following him to the stairs. He walked up them two at a time, beating me to the top.

I rolled my eyes at him and smiled.

His room hadn't changed any since I had been stuck with him. Other than all of the food, like pretzels, were now gone from the floor, hopefully thrown in the garbage.

"How's Zack doing?" He asked me, flipping the radio on and jumping onto his bed, messing the blankets worse than they already were.

"Uh, I dunno really. He doesn't look as bad now. I think he's relieved to have it off his chest. But he still has a lot he's gonna go through." I sit down next to him and grabbed his hand. "But let's talk about that later, okay?" I asked, smiling at him.

He didn't say anything, he just took my lead and started kissing me. It's funny, by now I should be used to it, not nervous, etc. But still I was the same as the first time he'd kissed me. Same as the 3rd time, the 6th, the 11th... It never changed, the way he made me feel when he would kiss me.

He tasted like chocolate chip cookie, it was good.

"Come here." He said, pulling me onto his lap, kissing me still. His right arm was around my waist, holding me so that I wouldn't fall. I put my hands on his face and kissed him back, I let one of hands fall onto his shoulder and I held it, squeezing as my kiss intensified.

I grabbed his hair and pulled a little, biting on his lower lip, getting more into it now, losing my embarrassment, I could tell by his reaction that I was starting to turn him on, and because I was on his lap, I kind of felt it too. He didn't seem to care, it wasn't bothering him any, the fact that he was getting a hard on under me.

I felt him trying to grind against me, and to be honest, I really didn't know what to do. I pulled back and looked at him, his perfect face. I could really see his want for me. It was so clearly written across his face.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked, his hand going up my shirt, rubbing my back.

"No, not at all. Sorry." I said, leaning back into him, he laid back so that I was on top of him, kissing him. I pulled up for only a second to smile at him, but he took advantage of it and yanked my shirt off, grabbing my head his both hands and yanking my lips back to his.

I kissed him and his neck, making sure not to kiss his neck too hard. Not that the school would know that I had done it, but yeah... they might figure it out.

His hands played down my back. I felt him getting harder under me, his left hand trying to slip into my pants.

I kissed him again and leaned up, making it impossible for his hand to get very far, he retrieved it and I smiled at him. He sighed as if it was murder not to be kissing me right now.

I started moving my myself back and forth, grinding against his hard on slowly, I felt myself beginning to grow one too.

His reaction was more than I expected, he let out a moan and grabbed at the top of my pants, scratching my stomach as he held onto them. It bled a little, but neither of us cared.

I didn't know what to do. We had never been this far, it had never gone like this. Was this dry humping?

Dry humping was nothing, right? It would be okay.

I got a little faster on him, moving my hips back and forth, feeling him under me, I was getting as turned on as him, It hurt to keep it in my pants, it made them feel so tight. I wondered if he felt the same way.

Judging by the look on his face, he wasn't in any kind of pain what so ever. I leaned down and started kissing him again. Kissing down his neck..

I crawled off the side of the bed and pulled him over to sit on the it, his legs hanging over, touching the floor. He was sitting up now. I bit down his leg, through his pants. Wtf? I didn't know how to do this, but he was probably a bit weirded out now.

"Cody, what are you doing?"

Did he have to make it even worse? I turned a bright shade of head and judging by the smile on his face, he was enjoying my torture. He scooted back and laid across the bed. I got back on him, kissing him.

I started grinding myself into him again, he was probably as hard as he could get now. I think I was too. It wasn't the most comfortable thing ever.

He really got into it though. He grabbed my sides and tried to help me move faster. But it was hard to do in blue jeans.

He let another moan out and smiled at me, I could tell he was really liking this. And that turned me on more, knowing that I was making him feel good right now.

I sped up on him, sitting up on him and moving back and forth, grabbing his shirt for support. I leaned down and kissed him, his breathing became harder and he bit my lip this time. He moaned into our kisses and I kept the steady pace of grinding against him.

I felt him pressing into me, trying to control himself, but instead he was thrusting into the grind and moaning in our kisses. He grabbed my hair, pulling it, but I knew he never even realized it.

I started to slow down, kissing him. sucking gently on his his lip.

"Cody no, don't stop yet. Keep going. I'm almost there."

I pulled back, almost there? He was gonna... Oh my. I hadn't expected him to do that. How dumb was I? Of course he was going to. I mean, look at it. I started back again for him, kissing him, his breathing being harder than mine for once.

I felt his grip on my tighten and he moaned louder than usual and I knew that he had just went over board. I really didn't know how to react to this so I just slowed down again til I was stopped, kissing him, his grip on my hair not tight anymore, not even pulling it.

For the first time, when I pulled back and looked at him, he was looking embarrassed. As if he finally caught up with the moment. I didn't know what to say.

"That felt good." He told me, smiling, his smile was like I can't even explain it. It is perfect. White teeth, just perfectness.

"I liked it too." I said smiling at him, and then rolling onto my back. "But I think you better go change."

He blushed at me and rolled over off the bed, going towards his dresser.

He got some clothes and started for the door. He turned back to look at me for a second.

"I can't wait til we do it without the clothes."

Click. The door shut, and I smiled.

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A/N: Okay. this might be the last update for like a week. So I hope you guys like it. Thanks for reading, and pleeeease review. xD


	21. Hormones

Chapter Twenty One: Hormones

Man, was that day at Christian's hot. Some of the best. It was so hard to hide the feelings I had for him, feelings that would never go away, no matter what. Something harder to hide? The growing bump on Max's stomach. We were in February now and it was getting harder than ever to hide the bump that I never imagined growing so fast. I mean, the bump was only about three months old, we had found out.

Zack was growing up more everyday. He doesn't know it, but I have seen the 'What To Expect When Your Expecting' book under his pillow, and I know he's trying his best to be grown up about this.

Baseball season starts in March for us, and now it's the 11th. Almost time, and to be honest, I'm nervous. I mean, I'm okay at it, but not great. I don't know how it'll go when I'm hitting... or pitching.. which ever they have me doing. Or maybe I can warm their bench. I have no idea.

Anyway, today I was at school, in the hallway actually, school was just over. I couldn't wait to get home and go to bed. I won't like, I'm incredibly tired today for some reason and i just wish I could rest. But guess what? I can't. "I need your help." Max had told me last night. I would find out why when I arrived home today.

I swerved in and out of people in the hallway as I pushed through. My bright red Aeropostle shirt stood out in the crowd of black I was taking charge through. I heard them grunt and mutter profanities as I cut through their 'clique' but I didn't care, I had places to be. And I was tired, and to be honest, a bit cranky as well.

By the time my feet hit the floor of the hotel lobby, I had become terribly anxious to see what it was that Max has needed from me today. I mean, what could it be? She still had many months to go. So it couldn't be about that, right?

I threw the door to the suite open and Max was on the couch shoving popcorn in her mouth, watching so girly show on tv, One Tree Hill or something... I dunno.

"Hey." She greeted me, flipping the tv off. "I had Zack take a walk.. while we talked."

"Umm, okay?" I asked, still confused on what this was about.

"Cody, like... I have this craving.. and i know you won't feel comfortable discussing this, but your gay, and I needed to talk to it with a serious person, you know?"

"Max... what is this?"

"I want Zack to have sex with me mor-"

"Get out of my house Max! Get out!" I got up and grabbed my head, this was not the kind of thing I could handle. Not this topic. "Go find one of your girlfriends and talk it out with her." I pointed to the door and closed my eyes.

"Oh calm down. I don't mean all the time, just maybe two or three times a week.."

She was about to say more when I decided to cut her off with a "You're GIRLFRIENDS Max!"

"Cody! Don't start with me, I'm Hormonal!"

"Excuses." I breathed, looking away from her.

"What'd you just say?" She asked getting some kind of fake attitude face on.

We both laughed at the same time and she hugged me. "I'm scared Cody. I really am."

I squeezed her against me as her face smashed into my shoulder.

"Everything is going to be okay. Everything will end how it's supposed to. I promise Max, nothing will happen. You and Zack are doing so good with this. You really are."

I felt my shoulder getting wet and I knew she was crying now. I loosened my grip on her, but continued with the hug. "Max, nothing is going to happen."

"Don't say that Cody, you don't know. What if it does? What if Cody." She snorted through her nose. "Zack isn't affectionate anymore. It's like he's not even attracted and it hurts me! Am I already fat and ugly to him?" Her crying intensified.

"It's okay Max." I pulled away from her, the tear stain on my shirt was nothing. "Max, stay strong. He's just scared. You both are. It'll be okay."

She smiled through her fear, and hugged me again, releasing me after only a second.

"Thank you. I think the moment is past, I'm okay now." She said giving me a shove to my shoulder. "How are you and Christian?"

"Well, we're pretty good. He's a cutie. I wanna get him something really good for Valentine's day because it's so close, but I dunno. I really think I want him forever Max." I came back to reality and by the look on her face, I knew I had said something so cheesy that only girls could love it.

"That's so cute Cody." She sit back down on the couch and flipped the tv back on. "Come and watch it with me."

I smiled and took a seat next to her. I looked towards the door that I hadn't shut. Nothing. Silence, it was as if the world was silent as we shared this moment. Right now my bond with Max was growing, and an everlasting relationship that only we would understand was forming. Best friends, that's what we'd become. The gay kid and the pregnant girl. Impossible combination.

I dunno when I dozed off but when I woke up, Max was laying against my shoulder asleep and the tv show we had been watching was off.

I tried to slip out without alerting her, but it never worked and she yawned as she woke up. "I better head home." She said looking at her watch. "It's almost 7. Zack should be coming back home soon too. Thanks for talking to me Cody. I feel a lot better. You'll just have to deal with me sometimes." She smiled and gave me a wink as she faded from my view and down the hotel hallway.

I shut the door and turned around.

What a day. I couldn't handle her. But in a good way. I had Valentine's day to plan. I wanted it to be so incredibly perfect. Just me and Christian, and no one else. No world, only us. I wanted to make him happy. In every way. And I was ready too. I had been waiting for the most special moment I could, and now it was right on my doorstep, and to be honest, I was nervous.

I don't wanna mess up. I don't wanna be bad at it.

You know the way you smile after someone you like tells you how amazing you are? That's the kind of smile I get from just seeing him, it's the best feeling in the world. Nothing can take it away from me.

And that's how I want him to feel. Satisfied and incredibly happy.

The way I felt when he first played me that song in the woods all that time ago. The way I felt that day in the hotel when he accidentally called me cute. The way I felt everyday of my life, just because he was part of it.

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A/N: Wow, it's been a while hasn't it guys? lol. I hope you at least semi enjoy the chapter, it's definitely not the best, probably is the worst, but I like the ending. ^^ However, thanks for reading and being patient with me. I promise the next chapters will be better. I felt like something like this was needed for some reason, but yeah, sorry its sucky. xP It'll get better. Review! Thanks. xD


	22. Valentine's Day

Chapter Twenty Two: Valentine's Day

Have you ever walked away from a crazy girl wanting to stab your eyes out as she bragged on how she would be with the same person forever?

Yeah, I did too once upon a time, but I guess you understand better when you're actually with someone you plan on keeping in your life forever, keeping them yours forever. Yeah... it all makes sense then.

Tonight I had the suite to me, myself, and I. Valentine's Day. It was extremely special, knowing that I was making it happen for us. Making our next giant step.

Candles, red, and pink? Too cheesy? Not in my opinion although everyone else would say definitely.

Basically I tried to keep it mild. Some pink and red balloons and a pink table cloth with tiny red hearts all over it. Some candles in the middle. Today I was glad I could cook, because to me that would be more special than ordering in. But what if he didn't like my cooking? I tried not to think about that...

I cooked some kind of Italian food. I'm not exactly sure what you call it, but to me, it was one of the most delicious things i've ever had.

By eight I was pacing back and forth. Where was he? I had told him seven. I was actually past wondering, I was worried. I had tried his cell three times, but no answer. It was Valentine's Day. Like, i'd never been able to celebrate it before. Never had anyone to celebrate with.. Where was he?

By eight thirty, my candles were burned down. Why not just blow them out? God, how could he do this on today. TODAY! It was the day I had anticipated most with him, everyone across the country was with the love of their lives right now, but I was left cleaning up the mess that was my hardest work.

He wouldn't pick up his phone and he wasn't showing up and now, here I was picking up the remainder of the worst night of my life. Okay, dramatic. But seriously, I wanted nothing more than to be with him tonight. I had tried to make it special, been excited! Only to be stood up for some reason unknown to me. What excuse.. no, there was no excuse.

As I let the food on the plates slide into the garbage can, the tears I had been trying to keep back begin falling. And once again, I became the cry baby that was Cody Martin.

I couldn't help it though. I had spent weeks planning this night. Not just for me, but for us. Tonight would have been a seal on everything I'd ever wanted. A freakin relationship.

But it wouldn't bother me too much. Because I still had all of that. A relationship. One that i would never let go. I loved him so much, and I wouldn't let myself cloud that by one day thing.

I let myself slump onto the couch, trying to wipe away my tears, but it was no use. New ones took their place almost instantly. I felt like rolling into a ball and never getting up. Never facing outside again.

Why? I dunno. I knew this wasn't as big a deal as I was making it, but I was hurt. I felt as if someone had cut my insides and poured salt on the wounds, It hurt, it burned, it was a searing pain. Not only in my body but in my head. The throbbing of the headache I experienced was immense. If I hadn't been already crying, I would have from this pain.

Don't get me wrong, I was insanely happy with him and where we stood together, but tonight was horrible. Absolutely terrible. It was like Christmas with no tree. No presents, no family, cookies, stockings, nothing. It was like peanut butter without jelly, it was like American Idol without Simon Cowell. You get what I mean.

It was around this time I realized I was mad at him. Yeah, mad. This was the first time I had been too, and it was weird. But I had a good reason to be mad, didn't I? He didn't show me up. Stood me up on Valentine's Day! Ugh, what was going on?

He would never do this intentionally, which scared me, which made me wonder if I was really mad, but I was wasn't I? Or was I scared, or worried.... My thoughts were in a million and three places. Wanting him. Bad. So bad. With me now. In this spot on love day!

I took a deep breath as Zack swung the door open slowly, peeking in.

"Is it safe?" He asked, shoving the rest of his body in, noticing I was alone.

"Yeah." I muttered, my voice cracked, as if my throat was scratched.

I saw him hesitate to ask me what was wrong, but then he shook his head and kept going. I knew he wasn't ready to talk about my gay love life, but he was respecting it, and that was enough for me. I hear the click of our bedroom door.

And then it happened. My phone ring. Not the normal ring though.

I walked over to it slowly. It was as if I had never heard that sound in my life, couldn't identify it. I looked down and saw Christian's name lit up. I flipped it open.

Text Message.

'Srry I couldn't make it. Forgive me.'

That's all it said.

Have you ever been punched, kicked, stabbed in the stomach? Thrown into a wall or door realllly hard? Shot in the chest? Yeah me either.

But I feel like I have.

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A/N: Sorry for that trainwreck of a last chapter. Hope you enjoy this one more. I like it. Sorry my updates are slow. Thanks for reviewing guys. Continue. ^^


	23. Brothers

Chapter Twenty Three: Brothers.

As I walked to school, I tried to look through my Math notes because we had that quiz to do today. I couldn't. I couldn't think of anything except the 14th. Today was the 17th and I hadn't seen or heard from Christian since the text message I had gotten hat night.

I'm scared. I'm worried. I'm totally sick from this. What had happened? What was happening? How could I do this. How could I just act like everything was okay, when obviously it wasn't.

I walked into the cafeteria. So full, yet completely empty.. or not? I saw him beside the windows in the far left corner alone. Hunched over, his hands holding his head as he looked at the blank table. I walked slowly over to him, not knowing what had happened with him.

"Christian?" I asked. He looked up at me. Pale. Chapped lips. Bags under his eyes. He looked like a zombie. Like someone who hadn't eaten or slept for days. He looked sad, hurt, confused even. Like he wasn't really here.

He said nothing to me. He just looked back down to the empty table, concentrating on something that wasn't there. I felt an ache in my heart and I sit down opposite him. "Christian. What happened?"

Still, nothing. I saw a tear tremble from his eye. He didn't try to stop it.

"Christian, please?" I felt myself getting ready to cry. I was so confused. The bell rang.

He got up and walked away from me. He said nothing. He didn't walk as he usually did. It was slower, like his feet were dragging him against his will.

I went to first period feeling like crap. Was he mad at me? What had I done? I didn't understand. I really, truly didn't.

By the end of the school day, my stomach was in knots and my head was throbbing. My heart ached, and my head went crazy with thoughts of what might be happening.

As I started home, I heard someone call my name. So weak. I knew it was him. I turned around and saw his fragile state. It sent another jolt of pain through my body.

He joined me walking. The weather was cold, so we both has coats on and all that kind of winter junk. No snow was on the ground, maybe it was too cold for that even? It was just really freezing today.

"I'm sorry." He told me as we walked. "I never meant this to happen. For you to get hurt."

"Christian, what's going on? You have me so worried."

We walked farther, he never answered.

"Cody, my brother.. my brother was in the army."

"Brother?" I asked confused. I had no idea of this brother he was talking of.

"Yes. We found out a few days ago that he was killed in a suicide bombing near Baghdad. I was incredibly close to him, Cody. What do I do without him?"

I stopped walking. Frozen in shock, sorrow. Not knowing what to say. What if Zack were killed? What if I lost him, forever? I felt the warm tears fall over my eyelids, and I looked at him, his appearance letting them fall even more. I didn't know what to say, or do. I opened my arms and walked over to him, wrapping them around him. "I'm so sorry sweetie." I said, it sounding slightly distorted through my tears.

I knew he had began crying. I felt his tears soaking into my shoulder, even though he was the taller one. "I miss him so much."

And he cried. Shock still flowed through me like you couldn't imagine. A brother? Army? Dead? I closed my eyes and tried to clear my head, my thoughts. I had no idea how absolutely bad this must feel. I'm sure he was completely broken inside, I mean, I was too.

When I finally got home, I just went into our bedroom and fell into the bed.

My boyfriend's brother had died. My brother was having a baby. Brothers. Some people take them for granted. They never realize how much they love them. How much a brother really means to them. They never know what it means to have a brother.. not til that brother is gone. I for one would never take Zack for granted. I would enjoy every minute I was able to spend with him.

Laying here, I have no idea what to do. How to help. What to say. All I know is that the love of my life was hurting, and god help me, I would do whatever it took, to help him out of it. No matter what it was. No matter how hard it would be. No matter how much time it would take.

Only one thing mattered.  
I was here for him.  
I would do what I could.  
Please god. Let it be enough.

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A/N: GEEEEZ. It's been a while. Sorry guys, I'm so busyyy. lol. But here's the next chapter. Break has started. YES. My Birthday is Monday. I'll be 17 ^^. lol. But anyway, if I don't get to update before Christmas, I hope you guys have an awesome one. Have fun! And I hope you get what you want. Thanks for reviewing and reading, please continue.


	24. Spring Break

Chapter Twenty Four: Spring Break

Spring Break. This is the moment I have been waiting for since January and I am so glad it is here. Late nights, no homework, and Christian time.. what could be better? He had been going through counseling sessions to overcome the death of his brother, although I knew it was still a deep bother to him, something I struggled so hard with to help him.

Baseball season was in full swing and I was having so much fun with it. I couldn't believe it to be honest, I knew I loved Baseball, but this was just amazing. The thrill of the game, the way you feel after hitting a curve ball. The jokes in the showers afterward. All of it was absolutely thrilling. And I had finally gotten over my self conscious issue in the showers, so it was all pretty great.

But this week was mine. 1 hour of practice a day of course, but that was nothing, I really enjoyed it. I mean who doesn't enjoy a little bit of game play everyday. It keeps you healthy. Or, well.. that's as his lips touched mine and looked at me. I could see that he was scared. He had messed up, mwhat I liked telling myself. It was hard to believe that it was already April 14th. Wow, were had the months gone? I mean, it was as if the months were just flying away and leaving me behind. My junior year was coming to an end, and I hadn't even stopped to enjoy it yet.

Then there was Max and Zack. 5 months along and believe me, she was bigger than ever. Like HUGE. I would say that she was a blimp, but that would be mean, right? Yeah that would be mean. They were getting more and more scared by the minute. Each day passed with them being scared, but then again, who wouldn't be? Having a baby at 16 must be scary.

"Cody!!" I heard Christian's chipper voice as I stepped off the sidewalk outside of the Tipton.

"Yeah?" I asked, not even expecting him, I had planned on walking to his house.

"You won't believe this." He said smiling standing in front of me. He grabbed my shoulders and looked directly at me. I forced myself not to get lost in his amazing eyes, or intensely cute smile. "Mom bought me a cat." He said, his grin bigger.

My mouth opened but nothing came out so I shut it. "Christian.. Never do that to me again. I thought something happened." I managed to finally spit out. He smiled really big again and leaned down to give me a kiss. He jerked back just ade it a public affair.

We both looked around at the people around us. No one seemed to take notice, so we chuckled uneasily and I scratched my head just so i'd have something to do. "Let's go to a movie." Christian suggested, still smiling. "I'll pay."

I smiled back at him. "I love you." My lips mouthed the words as we begin to walk towards the movie theater in town. There were a ton of people out today and it was warm, sunny. What could be better? What??

After the movie we went to Christian's house. His room was the same as usual, with the exception of the new kitten curled up on a pair of jeans by his bed. "Isn't she cute?" He said rushing over to her and petting her. "Her name is Zipper." He announced loudly, smiling. I really don't think he realizes how very cute he is. But oh my god, my insides were tickling me. He was literally that adorable over this little fur ball. Christian was a pretty masculine guy, and to see him like this was absolutely great.

We layed down on the bed, talking, smiling, kissing now and again.... enjoying each other.. our time together....

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"Coach Micky, I know what I saw. I know for sure. i'm positive. Cody Martin kissed a boy. That Christian kid. I promise I saw it correctly."

"Listen boy, are you absolutely sure.. he kissed him? No whispering or something, but a kiss?" Coach Micky asked, still in shock obviously.

"I'm sure coach. Positive."

"Thank you Todd. That's truly disgusting. There will be no queer bag faggots on my baseball team. I'll make sure he is off.. One way... or another."

Todd Jacobs smiled back at the coach.. clearly they had something planned.

Something painful. Embarrassing. Wrong. Something absolutely heartless.

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A/N: Okay, I needed this chapter, and yes, I know it's not very good. but I promise the next update will be good. PLEASE review guys, thanks so much! And Happy Late New Year. First update of 2009 xD. Thanks.


	25. Art, Oh Bloody Art

Chapter Twenty Five: Art, Oh Bloody Art

I opened my eyes to a beautiful, sunny Monday morning. May 18th. The end of the school year was fast approaching and so was the end of Max's pregnancy term. I walked into the kitchen and saw a very pregnant Max chowing down on a poptart while she helped Zack with his Math homework.

"Morning Cody." Zack said. Max nodded her head, her mouth full. I smiled and started towards the bathroom, swiftly scratching my butt.

I turned on the water and Brushed my teeth. After my shower I left feeling all clean and fresh. Ready for school. As it got closer to time to leave, I noticed that Zack wasn't dressed for school.

"Why aren't you dressed yet?" I asked, looking over the living room for my book bag.

"I'm not going to school today. We're going to a parenting class at the community building." I could tell the excitement in his voice was forced. Max looked away and he whispered to me behind his hand, "If you want to pretend to be me and trade places, I'm up for that." Max slapped him in the arm and narrowed her eyes towards him.

I giggled as my eyes caught my book bag behind the left side of our flowered patterned couch. I grabbed it and made my way out the door where I nearly ran into Christian head first. I stopped myself just in time.

"Good morning lovely." He smiled and kissed my head. He was so sweet and that was something I loved about him. He made my heart flutter on a regular basis. Something that by now should have been a rarity. His cute clear face was shining with cuteness. I have literally never seen a more perfect form of human than Christian was. I smiled back and him and he started telling me about an art camp he wanted to attend for the summer.

"But doesn't that mean it will take you from me?"

"Only til the second week of August." He said, trying his hardest not to make it sound like a lot.

"TWO MONTHS??" I felt myself shout before I could control it. "I mean, I'm happy you wanna do it, It's just... I don't wanna be away from you for two months."

"I can call you babe. I mean, I'll have my cellphone, and like I can email you and stuff, so there's no reason to worry really." He rambled. It really didn't matter what he was saying. He lost me when he called me babe. At this point, I was on cloud mine and he was muted. I saw his mouth moving, I even heard sounds, but they amounted to nothing. All I saw was his perfect face. And all I could think about was him being mine forever.. his heart of complete love.. for me. He was everything.

"We'll do it somehow." I smiled rejoining the world again.

I wanted so badly to grab his hand, but the fact that we were exiting the Tipton now stopped me. That wouldn't be a good idea.

On the walk to school he talked to me about his art camp. I had never even known he liked art. But he seemed so passionate about it, and it was so cute. As he talked to me, I wanted nothing more than to hear his every thought. I was mesmerized by him. His beauty, his heart, his personality, his soul, everything about him was perfect.

As we got to school a small drizzle of rain had started. Rain. My favorite weather. It was like drops of tiny wet love. So clear, so pure. The school seemed different today. People were whispering to each other. Where their looks of disgust directed towards us? People kept whispering as we walked through the school and into the cafeteria.

"What's going on? Do I have something on my clothes?" I asked Christian, confused.

"No, I don't.... I don't know what's going on." Christian answered, confused as well.

As we got to the front of the lunch are and were about to do to the breakfast areas, a group of boys from the baseball team surrounded us. Todd Jacobs stepped onto the table beside us and smiled ruefully.

"The faggots have arrived." He announced to the cafeteria.. and the guys from the baseball team that I had came to love. The boys I had called my friends. They closed in on us. We were gonna be punished for something we couldn't control. I closed my eyes as Christian grabbed hand.. I felt impact, and heard Christian scream. My heart ached, there was nothing I could do to protect him, I felt my hand being ripped away from his and I screamed as something sharp entered my abdomen. The last thing I saw was the blood running from Christians chest. My eyes were blurred, sound was deformed. As I hit the floor, my thoughts and literal being were silenced.

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A/N: Well guys, it's been over like what 3 or 4 months? lol. I'm sorry guys. I've been SO busy. I hope you Like the Chapter though. Please continue to review. x) Thanks for reading.


	26. Esperanza, Amor, y Dolor

Chapter Twenty Six: Esperanza, Amor, y Dolor

The smell of rubbing alcohol and coffee filled my nostrils as I opened my eyes. My head hurt from the amount of light reflecting off the white walls and into my eyes. I rubbed my temples and groaned.

"Easy, Cody." I heard my mom whisper into my ear. Her soft hand brushed my arm. I looked in her direction. Her face and form were disfigured and blurry, but soon my eyes focused and I saw her, a smile on spreading across her face.

I didn't remember anything at first, but soon those final moments in the cafeteria came to mind.

"How's Christian?" I asked, stretching my wound. I winced and groaned in pain.

"He's completely fine. Just a few bruises. He went to grab something to eat. He just got hit around and shot with a paintball gun." Zack said, suddenly entering my world in the hospital.

"Zack?" I asked, looking for him, finally catching him beside the door frame to the room. I turned my attention back to Christian. "But I saw the red blood from his chest...."

"No Cody, you saw red paintball gun stains." Zack reassured me, joining me at my bedside. "They stabbed you with a pencil though. Nothing that serious, you're gonna be okay. Just sore for a while. They cleaned the wound and stuff."

I lay there listening as Zack, now knowing that my Christian was okay, and that.. well, I had taken the bigger beating. That was good to me. That meant that he wasn't hurt, and a pencil hole in my side was worth that. I mean, sure it hurts pretty bad, but it's not permanent. I smiled.

"How's Max doin'?" I asked, Zack's facial expression suddenly changing as if he had been punched in the gut.

"Man, Cody.." Zack shook his head and forced a smile. "You know I don't like talking about that." He looked down to the floor and the smile faded.

"Oh? Since when? I didn't know." I asked seriously, reaching out for his hand. As I did a sharp pain erupted in my abdomen and I scream.

"Damn Cody!" Zack said pushing my hand back. "Stop moving before you kill yourself, dork."

I smiled.. or well I tried. I'm sure the pain was smiling for me.

"Just rest, I'm gonna go for a bit." Zack said as he grabbed a coke bottle off the night stand by my bed.

"Wait. You never answered me Zack.. How's she doing?"

Zack stopped in mid walk, his back to me. He never turned to look at me.. it was as if his head was limp as it pointed downward to the floor.

"Scared." He said. Then hurried from the room.

I lay there, wondering what must be going through his head. Completely ignoring the fact that mom was sitting across the room. But I couldn't imagine becoming a father at 16. What to do..? How to prepare? I wouldn't know. I would be absolutely scared to death. School..baby... would he have to get a job? Would....

As I thought about it, I felt my eyes getting heavy again. Probably from some pain killer I had coursing through my system. Before I knew it I was off in another land. Codyland. I was in a land of dreams.

I was surrounded in a pink fog.. I could see orange and purple frogs hoping around the ground. In the distance, several green castles were barely visible, red lights illuminating their windows. The sky was white with tan clouds in the shapes of animals. Many animals. Very different in size and shape.

As I stood there in the mysterious world, I saw a girl under a blue tree, which was filled with many yellow leaves. It was obvious that she was pregnant. The dried tears on her cheeks told me that she was very scared, worried.

I approached the girl. When I was next to her, I realized the girl was Max.

"Max?" I asked, looking into the girls wet eyes.

"Cody.. It's useless. I can't do this."

"Do what?" I asked, putting my arm around her. Her skin was as cold as ice.

Suddenly the Max in front of me turned to black dust as she was about to answer. I smelled cinnamon.. was that a TV in the background?

I felt myself rolling in the soft hospital bed.. but it seemed much crowded than before. I opened my eyes and smelled yet another familiar smell.

Beside me in the hospital bed, Christian was sleeping, his arm around the front of my chest. He looked like an angel as he slept so close to me.

His hold on me was tight and reassuring. I smiled as I left my fingers roam up and down his arm. So warm, strong.

I noticed that mom had gone. Of course. That was a good thing.

I was uncertain of the future ahead of me. I was uncertain how school would be from now on. I was uncertain of Zack and Max with parenthood in their near future. I was uncertain, that was positive.

However, as I lay there by Christian, his arm tightly around me, I realized something. No matter what we would stick together. For better and for worst. Forever with each other.

I mean what could go wrong?

I used to be Cody Martin.. Dork, geek, book worm.. whatever they called me. I used to get picked on constantly and I would receive random wedgies now and again. I was that same Cody Martin except now I had Christian. The one and only and most amazing person I could ever want. I went home smiling everyday. Call me a dork, a fag, or anything else. But the fact his that the words never break anything that one was his smiles couldn't fix.

As I lay here in this bitch pain, one thing IS certain.. I'm in love. This boy beside me has my heart.. And I never want it back.

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A/N: Grr, once again.. sorry for the slowness. I'm on top of this though. lol. I think I know where I want it to go and end. So we'll see. Thanks for reading and review guys. Means alot. Continue. Please! And sorry, I felt the need for a Spanish title. :)


	27. Cannibalistic Suicide

Chapter Twenty Seven: Cannibalistic Suicide

The short hospital stay was probably the most excruciating experiences of my entire life. Mostly because Mom still didn't know that Christian and I were more than school buddies. I wanted to tell her, but I knew that she already had enough on her mind, considering her son was having a baby within the next few months. 3 months to be exact. Max had recently entered her sixth month.

I was waiting for Christian to come over. Saturday had finally rolled around and we had decided to watch a horror movie called Cannibalistic Suicide. Now usually I wouldn't go anywhere near something like that. Those movies were just designed to give me, Cody Martin, nightmares. And make it near impossible to go to sleep.

On the bright side though, this would give me and excellent excuse to cuddle up with Christian. Max and Zack would be over in Greenfield visiting Tapeworm. Mom was singing an encore show until 3am. Which meant we could had the room to ourselves. Ah, the sound of that couldn't be anymore perfect.

There was still the one little problem though. I was still totally and completely nervous around him. I mean seriously, I don't understand how one boy can be so flawless and beautiful. I have always noticed when someone his "hot" or, as Zack would put it, "slammin'". But Christian was even better. He seemed fake. Fake because it's not humanly possible to be so sexy. Everything about him. His blonde hair, his hard sculpted body, the way he had that uneven smile that would never last long enough, his cute butt.. everything. I didn't know how I still got those silly butterflies after so long. It was obvious by now that he loved me as much as I loved him so I didn't honestly know what the problem was. I just felt so much less attractive around him. He was the personal definition of beauty.

A knock at the door silenced me. I walked over to it and opened the door expecting my Christian to look back at me. Instead the person I would want to see least stared back at me. Todd Jacobs. My hand absent mindedly felt the pencil wound Todd had given me only a two weeks ago.

I froze. Staring. Breathing. Barely.

"Cody, I just wanted to say i'm sorry." He said, staring down at the floor, shuffling his left foot on the rug.

My throat was drier than it had ever been, even on the hottest summer day.

"What?" I asked, unsure what kind of sick joke this must be.

"I'm sorry. I was jealous and.. I'm sorry. I want bother him- I mean you again." He said, hurrying off down the hallway as fast as he could.

I didn't understand. Not at all. What did he mean? Jealous? Why? Of what?

"Cody!" His voice pierced my mind and Todd left it without hesitation. I turned my head to the right to see him gracefully making his way to me from down the hallway. I smiled and my heart started to beat a little faster. He smiled back, flashing his brilliant white teeth.

"How are you feeling hun?" He asked as we turned to walk into the suite. I shut the door after he was in.

"I'm feeling okay." I smiled to him. "Ready to watch our movie?"

"Oh am I ever! I've been waiting for this movie to come on TV since Thursday!"

"Um, that's only two days Christian."

"I know, forever!"

I rolled my eyes and grabbed two bottle of tea from the kitchen. He was so cute.

He sit on the couch and I sat next to him, closer than I usually sit.

"Someone feeling a little clingy today?" He asked with a smirk.

I felt myself blushing, that was embarrassing.

He put his arm around me and kissed my temple. I laid my head on his shoulder as the movie started. A light rain was pelting off the ceiling and running down the windows.

Cannibalistic Suicide panned across the screen and the grossest movie I would ever see in my life began to play. With a plot like eating yourself to death.. who wouldn't get freaked out?

I felt Christian's hold on me strengthen. I looked up to him and realized that never even realized he was doing it. He didn't even realize that he had me the happiest I had ever been. He wasn't even trying! Everything about him was more than amazing.

"Ew, not again." I groaned as a man in his 20's bit into his shoulder ripping the flesh from the bone, his own blood smearing over his chin and mouth.

Christian chuckled at me. "Cody, this movie is excellent. Relax."

I let my head rest of his shoulder again. I made my fingers do a dance down Christian's stomach. He smelled so good. One of the best smells I had ever experienced in my life actually.

By the time the movie was over I had no appetite and I was afraid of going crazy.. and trying to eat myself. Yes, I know that probably sounds weird, but it happens.

"Hey, I have to get back home. My mother is making me and Kristen paint the room in the back of the house today." Christian said grabbing his rain coat off the little table by towards the door.

"Want a third hand?" I asked, following closely at his feet.

"No," He said situating the coat on himself and turning towards me. "I want the third hand to go rest, and stop worrying about self attack."

His hand brushed my cheek and he smiled at me.

"God Cody. You're so beautiful you know." He shook his head his focus was lost. I could tell he didn't mean to let that thought come to the surface. My face was on fire right now. And I felt like a giddy school girl inside.

"Have fun painting." I said, changing the subject.

"Yeah right."

He zipped his coat and got close to my face again.. He leaned down and as his lips touched mine I turned into jello. I breathed in his scent and clutched his hair in my fist a little to tight. He pulled back and started for the door. He opened it and started out.

He turned back and looked at me.

"Cody..." He hesitated and swallowed hard. "Cody.. I L-"

He looked down at his feet. Then back up to my face.

"Nevermind." He smiled, his face blushing terribly, and shut the door behind him.

I took a deep breath and looked at the door.

Everyday I spent with him seemed to be better than the previous.

I started back to the couch. I needed to watch something to get my mind out of the bloody cannibal thoughts. As I flipped through the channels the weird exchange with Todd came back to mind. Again I wondered what he had meant. Why had he apologized? What had happened? And most importantly.. why was he jealous of.. me...?  


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A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys. And for reading. You're all amazing. Continue and I hope you enjoy. :)


	28. Letter From Todd

Chapter Twenty Eight: Letter From Todd

The smell of a disgusting chem lab filled my nostrils as I entered my science class. My head was feeling stuffy and I hadn't really slept last night.. nightmares. Stupid Todd Jacobs had been haunting me in my dreams too.

I waited at my desk for Christian to come in. He had stopped by the bathroom when we were on our way to class. I looked at the clock and noticed there was only thirty seconds or so left before the tardy bell would ring. Suddenly there he was, pushing through the door so gracefully that you wouldn't have even known he was nearly late. His perfect crooked smile began to spread as he saw me. He took the desk beside me and made a weird face. I knew he was expressing his hate towards the chemistry lab smell.

Before I could fully enjoy the presence of Christian, Todd Jacobs came crashing into the room. He looked at Christian and smiled. I turned to Christian just in time to see him smile back.

"Um, what are doing?" I asked. Not fully understanding why he thought he should smile back at the boy who had attacked us.

"He isn't so bad. We talked and he apologized. He actually seems like a really nice kid."

I turned in disbelief and faced the teacher as she started talking. Her explanation of the chemistry lab wasn't even registering into my mind. I really didn't care anymore to be honest.

My insides were tangling and my chest felt extremely stuffed. How could he befriend this guy so easily? The guy who beat us up.. hurt us.. got me kicked off the baseball team.

"...Groups of 3! No more, no less!" The teacher was shouting. Before I could wrap my head around her words, Todd was standing beside me. Was this a joke?

"Hi, Cody!" He said, pulling a mechanical pencil from his pocket. "I totally understand this so you better be glad I'm in your group." He said chuckling.

"Actually Todd, I can do this too." I said, knowing my voice was harsh as I walked between him and Christian and too our lab station.

I didn't know if I was just being a whiner or not, but I was feeling incredibly hurt.

I grabbed a lab sheet and begin. Slowly, Todd and Christian made their way to the lab station. I didn't speak to them and honestly I didn't listen to their conversation either. I was furious.

"That's wrong." Todd's annoying voice pierced my ear and I turned to him with the most hateful look I could manage.

"What Todd? What?"

"No need to be upset Cody. Math isn't everyone's subject he said yanking my pencil away and erasing my work, redoing it with his 'better' knowledge.

I fumed. How dare him. The boy who had just shortly ago beat me up! Put me in the damn hospital! How dare him act like we could ever be friends! How dare Christian allow that! I felt my heart beating faster as my level of anger heightened. He handed my pencil back smiling. I snatched it away and re-positioned myself back over the paper.

I caught bits and pieces of a conversation that seemed to be about fishing and art from Christian and Todd as I worked. I tried my very best to ignore it, but it ate at me like maggots. In the bit of my stomach, my intestines. Chewing, biting, scratching, hurting..

I finished the paper just ten minutes before the bell would ring. I put it in the classwork basket near the teacher's desk then returned to my own. To my surprise, Christian didn't follow me. He was still discussing the previous weeks football lose for the high school.

"Christian, come here." I said, my body turned to face them.

"One sec, Cody." He said smiling that smile that makes me melt.

I turned back around and waited. For six minutes I waited and he never made it up to me before the bell rang. I turned back to him and he looked at me. Todd was heading back to his seat.

I got up and began to walk away.

"Cody, wait." He said hurrying to me and grabbing my arm. "I'm sorry. Did I do something?" He asked. I could tell the confusion in his face was as real as the pain in mine must have been.

I jerked my arm from him.

"Cody, what happened?" He asked again, I could tell I was hurting his own feelings now.

We had never been like this and I was hurting. I never imagined we could ever be like this. He looked at me pleading for some answer, but I couldn't speak. He turned and walked away. Faster than usual, and for the first time ever, he didn't look back when he left. I hurt more with every step he took.

Everything that had been his fault had suddenly turned into my own. As I wondered why I was so whiny and if I had just ruined the best thing that had ever happened to me, Todd walked by, flipping a letter onto my books, a sly smile on his face.

I knew whatever he had written in the note wasn't good. So I slipped it into my pocket until I finished my day.

Christian never met me after school. Nor did I expect he would anyway. I ached for him on the bus ride home. He wasn't walking me home for the first time since we had be together. I wondered if he missed me, wanted me, and hurt because of me as much as I did for him.

I wanted nothing more than to take back everything I had done. I had been wrong, right? I had no reason to act the way I did.

The suite was empty.  
I threw my stuff down and slumped onto the couch. I pulled the note from my pocket, wondering what it might say.

My fingers were trembling, my breathing completely stopped as I unfolded the piece of paper.

I could hear Todd's voice in my head saying the words as I read them.

"I'm gonna find out if his ass is as good in bed as it looks. I'll let you know."

I felt my body trembling and I started to cry. Eight hours ago I would have said Christian would never leave me or doubt what we had together. But after what I had done today, I wasn't so sure. And that scared me. A lot.

I did know two things though.

One, Todd Jacobs was the enemy, and two, I would fight for Christian.. and so far I was in the lead. I had one thing Todd Jacobs didn't.. his heart... for now.  


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A/N: Rawr, Imma slow poke. lol. Sorry guys, I get to it when I can. Thanks for reading and reviewing and continuing to follow it. Continue? Thanks.


	29. I Evol Uoy

Chapter Twenty Nine: I Evol Uoy

July 17th. Time has been passing by without me. So much has happened, so much.

I lifted my hand to wipe the sweat beads from my forehead. Summer had arrived in full swing and I really wasn't enjoying all of it's affects.

It seemed that I was being totally ignored lately. All the talk about the baby coming was really starting to sink in. Max had finally reached her 9th month and everyone is in hysterics wondering if the set due date would be correct. July 31st. It was kinda overwhelming to have a twin brother that was having a baby at such a young age.

But anyway, I had problems of my own. Christian had been my amazing boyfriend for nearly a year and I loved him more than there were stars in the sky. There was just one little obstacle that seemed to be in the way lately, Todd Jacobs.

Not in a million years would I ever dream that Todd Jacobs was gay, but he was. And he wanted my boyfriend. Now you may think that all's fair in love and war, but it's not. Todd doesn't love Christian, I do. Todd just wants to have sex with him.

The thought ripped at my heart. Sometimes I felt as if Todd Jacobs was a cheese grater and my heart was a chunk of cheese. My thoughts were interrupted when I saw Christian entering the suite.

"Hey, Cody." He said cheerily, sprinting over and wrapping his arms around me. He held me there just as he had so many times before. So gently, yet so very tight. I inhaled the smell around him, perfect. I felt so warm and loved in those moments. Those little hugs from the one I cared for more than anything in the world.

"Hey." I said smiling as he pulled away from me, his strong arms releasing my body.

I grabbed his hand and walked over to the couch with him.

"Cody, listen." He said, positioning himself onto the couch Indian style. I followed his actions and did the same. He took both of my hands in his. "I want to take you somewhere."

I didn't reply, I just looked into his amazing eyes. They spoke more words than any tongue could. So brilliant and sparkly. A very sign of perfection.

"Okay?"

I shook my head and smiled.

"Yeah, of course. Let's go."

He released my hand and started for the door. I followed him. After we got away from traffic and people he pulled a blindfold from his pocket. Gently, he put it around my eyes and took my hand, guiding me to an unknown place.

"You're gonna love it, babe." His hand tightened around mine.

I smiled as a floaty feeling entered my body. Nothing made me more giddy than him calling me babe. I was sure my cheeks were redder than any rose at that point. It was funny that the effects of his words and actions never changed for me since the day we met.

The earth under my feet was becoming extremely grassy and I begin to wonder where it was we were going. Before I could wonder for too long, we stopped moving and Christian released my hand. I felt him approach me from behind. He put his arms around me and snuggled his face into my neck, kissing it. I let myself relax into him, almost falling when he regained his posture and begin removing the blindfold.

As the black cloth fell from around my eyes I felt my heart glow. It was nothing big, or magnificent. It wasn't expensive or showy. Not breathtaking or flashy. But it was the sweetest thing I had ever saw.

We were surrounded with trees. The grass under my feet spread for what must have been miles, so lush and green. The air was crisp and the aroma of wild flowers filled my nose.

To the left a large murky lake set undisturbed and beautiful. Then, in front of me.. under a large oak tree was a checkered picnic blanket and a basket.

Usually I would have called this stupid and cheesy.. But knowing who had done this for me made me feel so amazing, and I loved it. I was speechless.

"Are you hungry?" He asked.

"Yeah." I managed to spit out.

He took my hand and we walked over to the blanket and sit down. He opened the basket and I smiled at him.

Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and pretzels. I should have known. Gosh, it was cute.

As we set there talking everything else had seized to exist. There was no coming baby, no doubt or dread, no Todd Jacobs.

There was me and there was him. This was how I liked it. Upon finishing his sandwich, he leaned over the mess in the middle and kissed me. Our tongues stuck together from the peanut butter and when he pulled back we giggled. This time, I leaned over and kissed him. I kissed him like I never had before, loving every moment my tongue was with his.

My hand rubbed through his hair, his held the back of my head. I pulled back and looked at him. Gosh, he was something to look at. So beautiful.

"Cody." He said, looking straight into my eyes, my very being. We were Indian style again and he took my hands in his. He grabbed my hair and kissed my lips softly, smiling as he pulled back.

"What is it?" I said looking at him, I was floating again. He lifted me so high inside, made me feel like the only boy in the world. My heart was fluttering and I felt so anxious when I was alone with him.

"Nothing." He said shaking his head quickly side to side.

"This was so cute." I said, smiling again, probably blushing.

"You're so cute." He said ruffling my hair.

"I never wanna be without you." I told him my mood was suddenly serious, as I stroked his hand in mine.

"You won't be." He said back.

I looked down at his hand and smiled. Suddenly he gripped my hands in his.

"Cody."

I looked up at him. His lips had become suddenly dry and his heart was beating fast enough to make his shirt move a little. He leaned into me and kissed me again, I felt his hand pushing the back of my head closer to his as he kissed me softly.

He pulled back and looked at me, his face was so perfect and a look of longing was tangled in his expression.

"I love you. So much."

Bang. My heart exploded. My breath was gone, and I was suddenly warm. I had waited so long for these words. Had I misheard him? No. He loved me, he said it, he meant it.

"I love you, too."

My lips were dry too now. He leaned into me and pushed me back, kissing me. His hand rubbed up and down my leg and side. He kissed me harder, his body lying on top of me. The warmth between us was like fire. My hand found his hair and I closed my eyes.

He leaned up only long enough to pull my shirt off. He threw it on the grass beside us and started kissing my neck.. then lower to my chest, then to my stomach. His tongue moving so perfectly, knowing exactly what to do to make me crazy. It felt so good. As his tongue moved down to the edge of my pants, his hand tugging at the button, five little words kept playing over and over and over again in my head.

"I love you."

"So much."

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A/N: I'll try to update as soon as I can. Thanks for reading and reviewing guys. Keep it up, please. Thanks. ﻿


	30. Beautiful Nightmare

Chapter Thirty: Beautiful Nightmare

Christian had just unbuttoned my pants when we heard twigs snapping, as if someone was walking towards us. As quickly as we could, we jumped up to our feet, me buttoning my pants. The bulge is my pants was no secret that was able to be hidden. Just as I grabbed my shirt, I heard his voice, my teeth grinding together as soon as I did.

"Ooops, sorry about that!", His cheery words seemed to carry into my ears and scratch at my brain. I turned towards him slipping my shirt on.

"It's alright, Todd. I thought this place was secluded." Christian said smiling. Smiling, as if this was okay.

"My dad owns this. I was just going for a walk and I thought I heard something over this way." Todd said, his eyes following my body to my crotch, which was quickly going back to normal.

"Having fun?" He asked me.

"Until you showed up." The words left my mouth before I had time to put them into a nicer phrase.

"Don't be mean, Cody." Christian said, moving next to me and rubbing my shoulder.

Don't be mean? DON'T BE MEAN??? What did he mean? This was MY perfect moment, and it had just been ruined by the person I hate most in life. Was I not supposed to be angry?

My anger continued to grow when I heard Todd ask Christian if he wanted to help him paint his fathers shed the next day.

As soon as I heard Christian say yes, my anger turned to sadness. I let myself fall into a sitting position on the picnic blanket, Christian's back to me as he faced Todd. I stopped listening to them and let the thoughts inside my head take over. It was a weird feeling. Seeing the two people that you love and hate most, talking... getting along.. after what he did.

I felt sick, my stomach knotting as I remembered the note that Todd had written me. What it had said. My heart felt as if it were slowing, tightening. He wanted my boyfriend. He was stopping us from being together.. But how? How did he know we'd be here?

"Cody?" Christian's voice broke my trance. His sweet, loving, soft voice. "Cody? Are you there?" His hand was waving in front of my face. I hadn't even noticed that Todd had left.

"Christian.. he's bad news."

"Don't even start with that Cody, he's been a nice guy. He deserves a second chance. Everyone always does." Christian said, the annoyance in his voice shocked me.

"He wrote me a letter though. About you. About..." I couldn't say it.

"About what?" He asked, grabbing my hand. His soft touch sending waves of happiness through me. Happiness that mixed with my anger. The strangest feeling crawled through my body.

"About, like.. sleeping with you." My voice cracked and my chest tightened as I said it.

Christian dropped my hand and stood up, looking down on me.

"Are you serious right now? Are you really gonna make up stories about him, just to make me hate him? Why is it so unbelievable that he's changed Cody? He is trying to be nice, but you won't let him!" Christian's face reddened with anger as he yelled at me.

I couldn't move. He didn't believe me, he was yelling, he was mad. I was hurt. Hurt that he didn't trust me enough to believe me over the boy who had hurt us. I stood up to face him. I tried to hug him, but he backed away, A punch to my heart.

"Listen, you don't have to make stuff up to keep me with you Cody. I love you! Have you not been paying attention this past year? You mean everything to me. But what you're doing is wrong."

"Christian, I'm telling the truth! Why are you taking his side? You're doing everything that he wants. You're believing him, and he's moving in on you. He's gonna take you from me, and you are too stupid to even realize that!"

Warm, salty tears overflowed and started slowly flowing down my face. My heart was aching and I felt completely shut off from him. I saw him shaking his head at me, and I knew he still didn't believe me.

"I don't know what to say right now." He said running his hand through his hair, sighing.

"Don't say anything." I said, wiping my eyes.

I turned from him and I started to run. I didn't know where I was running, but I didn't slow down. I heard his voice screaming my name, I knew he was running after me. But I ran harder, farther, faster than I ever had. I swerved in and out of trees, over rocks and over holes in the ground.

The air smothered me. The clean, sweet smell mocked my nearly perfect day. My feet hurt as they beat down upon the ground, Christian's voice fading.

I didn't want to see him and I didn't want to talk to him.

Everything had been so perfect before Todd Jacob's had ruined it.

We had never fought before him. Nothing. I wanted to go back to the times before Todd. How could everything crumble so fast? Thirty minutes ago I was losing my virginity to the man of my dreams and now I was running from him, crying.

Ahead of my I saw a break in the trees, traffic.

I was almost out of these woods, a place that had only created my worst nightmare.

I didn't know what tomorrow would bring. I didn't know where I stood with Christian. I didn't know how this situation would fix itself. And I didn't know what Christian was thinking or if he cared.

As I reached the road, I slowed my running to a walk. My heart beating fast, hard. I inhaled greatly, taking the deepest of breaths.

After I had regained my normal breathing, I started to walk.

In my pocket, my cellphone vibrated. I took it out, my heart falling when I saw Zack's name on the text.

"Cody, it's time. Where are you? I need you. Hospital. Now."

In an instant, my whole mood turned around. From anger, hurt, and sadness to complete excitement and joy. I took in a deep breath and did something I thought I ever would. I ran onto the road and waved my arms til a car stopped. Finally, one did.

"Can you take me to the hospital?"

"Yeah, are you okay?" The brown headed girl inside asked.

"Yeah, fine." I said hopping into the passenger seat.

I couldn't think. I couldn't move. My body was covered in goosebumps. Zack, my brother, was becoming a father. And the only thing that mattered right now was being there when he did.

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A/N: Thanks for reviewing guysss. Okay, so question. If my story got graphic one day, would that be okay with you guys? As in M rating? And also, have a Happy Thanksgiving/School break. And buy Lady Gaga's new CD, The Fame Monster. It's out Monday, and she's awesome! Okay, thanks. Review!


	31. Damien

Chapter Thirty One: Damien

White, white, white, white, white, white, white.. The smell of alcohol.. white. Yes, I was in the hospital waiting room. I was sitting by myself on the left side of the room. Max and Zack had been in here for seven hours now. How long did it take to push a baby out? Tall men and little woman kept leaving and entering in their white and green scrubs. Bustling around to ensure health on all that they were able too. On the right side, mom and Max's parents where sitting. They looked scared and sick. Anxious and completely unknowing. Their babies were having a baby. I couldn't imagine how it must feel.

However, this was supposed to be a happy, joyous moment, and trust me, it was, but they were worried too. My eyes were beginning to grow tired and the smell of the sterilized hospital was beginning to make me a little sick.

I was of course doing everything that I possibly could to keep Christian in the back of my mind. This was Zack's night and I wasn't gonna let anything ruin it for him, especially me.

The thing with Christian was sad really. Like I remember back in the beginning and for so long that I just had butterfly's all the time around him. Every kiss was as though it was the very first. But now everything seemed more dead. I wasn't even excited to see him again. And I felt like it was all my fault, even if it wasn't. I hurt so deeply, but I wouldn't pay attention to that right now. Not tonight.

I closed my eyes. But all I could see was him, so I opened them again and sighed.

Mom came and sit next to me and put her hand on mine.

"Are you okay Cody?" She asked. For the first time in months, her look of concern wasn't for Zack or Max.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" I said forcing a dry little laugh out of my sore body. The running had really taken a toll on me.

"Honey listen.." Mom started, spinning my legs off the seat on the other side of me so that I was in an upright position. "I know things that you may think I have no idea about. And I know when my baby is hurt. I can tell that you are. So tell me what happened."

My throat closed and I felt myself becoming nervous. Knew things that I think she didn't?

"Nothing mom, I just had a fight with my friend."

"With Christian?" She said, whispering so that it was just me and her in this conversation.

I didn't reply. I just stared at the flowery picture on the other side of the wall. The cheaply painted lilies and roses surrounded in the big plastic gold frame...

"Listen, I don't know if you're comfortable talking about this with me so I'll just say a few things and leave you alone. First off, he's a good boy Cody. He's not like alot of them. When he's in it, he's in it. I don't know much about relationships, but I do know when I see a good guy. And that's what he is. So don't let this little fight or whatever it is break you two apart. Don't let him go over something little." She kissed my head and hugged me and got up to leave, but I interrupted her.

"Mom?"

"Yes, Cody?"

"How did you know about...?"

"I'm your mother Cody, I just know."

She walked back to her seat and sit down. I felt a little better. Mom knew I liked Christian and she didn't hate me. This was good. Real good.

I was thrown from my la la land when I saw Zack restlessly walk into the waiting room. Completely dressed in scrubs, his blonde hair poking out from under the hat on his head. He looked so tired and completely different than I had ever seen him. His eyes were blood shot and his face was that of a ghost. He looked so weak, yet so much more mature than yesterday.

"You guys wanna see him?" He asked, a smile slowly spreading across his face.

Mom jumped up and ran to him, holding him tightly against her chest, now in tears. "I'm so proud of you." She said, releasing him. He almost fell as she did and then started leading us back through the maternity ward.

The hall was filled with screaming and crying.

We finally came to a room filled with new babies. It was painted with pink and blue polka dots and storks on the walls. It smelled like a mix of baby powder and something nasty. I instantly hoped the suite wouldn't adopt this horrid smell.

He walked to a small bed holding a child that was dressed in a blue outfit. A tag on the side said 'Damien Martin' and had a blue capped stork on it.

"We named him Damien." Zack said stating the obvious.

"He's so beautiful." Zack's mom said, now crying as well. Her husband consoled her in a hug as they smiled at the little baby in front of me.

He was extremely tiny with very little blonde hair coming from his little head. His eyes were closed and his face was slender like the rest of him. He couldn't be more than five pounds.. maybe six. So tiny.

He was absolutely adorable, which I honestly didn't expect. I usually find babies to be quite ugly.

Zack walked over to me and clapped his hand down on my shoulder while we looked at the baby. "His middle name is Cody. Even thought it doesn't really fit. You mean alot to me and I really wanted him to share such an amazing person's name. Thanks for always being there for me."

I turned to him and hugged him tighter than I ever had before. I loved my brother so much and this was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me. I released him and he patted me on my back. "Thanks for putting up with me." He said laughing.

"Do you guys wanna see Max?" He asked turning to Max's parents'. They quickly accepted and he led them out of the nursery room.

I stood beside Mom and looked down at Damien. He was perfect and I was suddenly really happy and excited for Max and Zack.

Mom reached around my shoulder and held me close to her. I looked up at the wall and around the room back to the window that showed the hallway. I suddenly had to pee.

I told Mom that I would be right back and began wondering down the hallway's looking for the little white man that would tell me there was a bathroom there. After somehow making my way back to the waiting room in the front of the hospital way down on the first floor, I found a bathroom. After I pee'd I started back into the waiting room, but something caught my eye.

In a chair n the corner of the waiting room, a boy was asleep. A blonde boy, Christian. I inhaled deeply and held myself back from crying as all of my emotions rushed to the top of my heart at once. He had obviously been here for a long time, thinking he was in the right waiting room. He looked worn out and troubled as he slept.

I didn't know what to say or if I should even wake him up from his sleep. So I didn't. I just sit down beside him and leaned my head on his shoulder, slipping my shoes off and putting my feet in the chair with me. The smell of sterile alcohol, white, white, white, white, white...sleep.

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A/N: I hope everyone had a good holiday! And is having a fun break. I hope you're enjoying the story. Thanks for your reviews, pleaseeee continue. :)


	32. Awake?

Chapter Thirty Two: Awake?

I opened my eyes, feeling a hand running through my hair. When the blurry world around me adjusted to my eyes, I saw Christian above me, and my head had someone ended up on his lap. I leaned up and wiped my eyes out with my hands.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep." I said, still rubbing my eyes.

"Cody, it's okay. I love seeing you asleep. You look so cute!" He said, smiling at me. Honestly, it was as if we had never fought and more than anything I just wanted to hug him right now.

"I'm sorry." I leaned over and I hugged him. He didn't say anything, but he held me tight in his arms. He hugged me as tight as he could without hurting me and I could feel how much he loved me every second of it. This had to be the most awkward hug I have ever had, but it was always very soothing.

When we released each other, I felt a sudden rush of pain in my chest. All of the love that I had felt in that very moment was gone and now I was just staring into his tired eyes. This hug was tight for a reason. One that I wasn't ready for nor expecting.

He stood up and looked at me. A pain filled desperate stare. As if he was trying to hold onto the image of my face inside his brain.

I couldn't move, couldn't breathe, couldn't even think. I was scared. More than I ever had been. He hugged me like he would never see me again. I felt myself release a gasp of air. I couldn't do this. I couldn't lose him. I felt sick, but the trash can was too far away and i felt the burning sensation leaving my stomach and moving up my chest. The trail of burning acid and vomit expelled from my mouth onto the hospital floor as I fell onto my hands and knees, my heart falling.

I saw him walking away, but I couldn't stop him. I reached out for him, but my left hand slipped in the puke and I fell onto the mess. He kept walking, leaving me there, alone.

_Beep. Beep. _

I opened my eyes, the elevator was opening and a group of older people were getting out.

"Hey there, sleepyhead." Christian smiled at me. He reached over beside him and grabbed a brown paper bag. "Breakfast?"

I leaned up, he was looking back at me, chipper as ever. He was there and he was mine.

I took the bag and opened it. Bacon, egg, and cheese. My favorite.

"Have you eaten?"

"Yeah, I ate without you. No offense but I was starving. You didn't even know I was gone!" He said grinning.

"I missed you." I told him as I took a bite. The crumbs fell down my chin and onto my lap. He grinned at me and shook his head.

"I missed you more!" He said. "I hated what happened with us back in those woods. You're my whole life, and I didn't like it when you ran."

"I'm really sorry." I said, looking down at my lap.

"You don't need to be sorry that I was a jerk, babe." He gently grabbed my chin and turned my head to look towards him. "I jeopardized my relationship with you! I was so dumb, everything I did was so dumb, and I'm sorry, Cody. I'm so sorry."

Before I could say anything he took me in his arms and hugged me tight like in my drea- nightmare. The only difference is that when he let go this time, I still felt his love. I could almost still feel his arms around me and I was so grateful that he was mine.

"Let's go home." I said taking his hand in mine and beginning to walk.

I felt him stumbling every now and again as we walked and I knew it was because my sleeping on him had caused him to sleep a little more poorly.

I didn't know how things would go from here, but anything had to be better than what they had been.

"Cody, when we get home, I want to finish our picnic." I heard him say as we walked.

"We did finish eating." I said, confused. I looked at him, my face probably projecting the confusion.

"Cody," He said, stopping, looking only at me. "I don't want to finish eating. I want _you_."

Suddenly, I knew what he wanted to finish. And I couldn't have been more excited, or ready to let him finish it.

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A/N: So I know its been like 5 months. I'm sorry! School is a bitch. Dx But I graduate soon! Which is so weird. Since I was in 10th grade when I started this. And now, I only have 8 school days left! Hope you guys enjoy this, please review, and thank you!


	33. Losing It

Chapter Thirty Three: Losing It

I led Christian into the empty suite. Into the room that I had once shared with my brother Zack. He wouldn't remain in the room much longer now that the baby had been born. Christian kicked the door shut behind him and placed his lips softly against mine.

Just like it always did, my heart fluttered like a newly hatched butterfly as I inhaled his breath and kissed him back. His tongue entered my mouth and played innocently with mine while his hand found his way down my back, cupping my butt firmly in his grasp.

Instantly his tongue left my mouth just as quickly as it had entered and he pulled my shirt off over my head, his tongue instantly finding its way back into my mouth. His hands touched every part of my naked skin and his touch was so loving. I followed his lead and brought his shirt up over his head, separting our mouth's, but only for a second. He pushed me onto the bed, climbing over top of me, kissing me harder and harder. His hands found their way up and down my legs and up the sides of my stomach to my hair.

He bit lightly against my bottom lip and licked across it giving me the most intense feeling I had ever had. For a brief moment he stopped and looked at me, as if he was troubled by something. He must have noticed that I was onto him or shruged it off quickly, because he was kissing me before I could open my mouth to ask.

He gently unbuttoned my pants and slid them down, off of me, into the floor. His soon followed. I couldn't believe that this hot, sexy, blonde boy was my boyfriend and that I was about to have my first time with him. His skin was so smooth with light blonde hairs on his arms and legs. Barely anything to notice. The bulge in his black boxer briefs was easy to notice. It was a perfect size and almost irresistable. His strong hands traveled over my body as he kissed me, both of us growing inside our boxers.

I felt him get harder and harder in his underwear and I couldn't have been more nervous. He pulled back and looked at me.

"Cody, you are beautiful. Are you ready?" He asked me, his face shining like an angel. His hair so perfect. His body looking as though his belonged to some Greek god from six thousand years ago. There was only one answer.

"Yes." I managed to mutter, feeling so good underneath him.

He leaned into me and begin kissing me. Then my neck. Then my chest. He traveled down my entire stomach with soft kisses until he was at the start of my boxers. He leaned up and started gently pulling them down. Soon, I was exposed to him. Totally exposed for the first time.

I felt a tear in the corner of my eye. But it wasn't sadness. It was love. And I felt it stronger than ever. I smiled at him and he slid his own underwear down. Perfect.

I could have never imagined how truly perfect he would be naked. His skin was so tan. Everywhere. And he was so hard, wanting me. Me, Cody Martin. I was so lucky. I felt him pressing against my butt as he leaned down to kiss me. He kissed me harder and harder, then my neck. Biting it, harder and harder. I felt a surge of pain convulse through my body and I gasped, squeezing my eyes closed and gritting my teeth. He looked at my face and didn't move for a second until I had opened my eyes. He kissed my lips softly, smiling when he pulled his head back up. He was so gorgeous.

The pain was extreme as he started thrusting. I couldn't stop squeezing my eyes shut and gasping at first. My fingers tangled in the bed sheets. He kissed me softly and the pain started to became non existent as pleasure ran through my veins. I opened my eyes and saw Christian in a way I never had before. I saw him as my lover.

I begin to moan, unable to hold back the intense pleasure I was feeling throughout my body. He thrusted harder and harder. I could only hear our moans and skin slapping together. He was amazing. In a moment of lust, I flipped him over and climbed on top of him. His body was amazing underneath me, strong and firm. I sit slowly down on his dick, feeling all of it slide into me. Again, pain was followed by intense pleasure. I placed my hands on his chest and begin to bounce. He moaned and I felt his hands travel down my back and grope my butt. I bounced harder, faster, moaning. He felt so good inside me. A pleasure like I could never imagine being possible. I felt him begin thrusting under me, harder than he ever had. The pleasure was too much. My body collasped onto him and he thrusted even harder. Harder than I ever though possible.

I found strength to sit back up on him and I slowly took back the control, riding on him slowly. His hand closed around my dick and started to stroke it. His touch was amazing. He stroked me faster as I gently rode him. Before I could help it, I screamed and felt cum shoot out of me more powerfully than it ever had before. I collapsed onto him. I couldn't move. Nothing has ever felt this amazing before, I was still moaning and breathing unevenly even after he had stopped stroking it. He rolled me over and put a leg on ever side of me, his dick in my face. I opened my mouth and he slid it in. Too much, too fast. I chocked and pulled back. He smiled down at me and slid back into my mouth, throwing his head back in a moan, then smiling at me again, biting his lip.

I sucked on him. It was the weirdest taste, but in a good way. I sucked the head, licked around it with my tongue while it was still in my mouth. He moaned louder and louder and I felt him growing harder in my mouth. Finally he pulled it out of my mouth and begin stroking it over my face. I opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out. Within no time at all I felt a warm liquid shooting onto my tongue and onto my face. He moaned loud as ever then fell onto his back and looked him breathing hard and smiling.

It had only taken us seven minutes. But from what I had heard, some first times didn't even last that long.

I knew in this moment that I loved him and that I never wanted anyone else. Ever. This was my guy. Perfect to me and only me. He kissed me and held me closely. I felt so secure, so loved. I was in heaven. Honestly, it couldn't get better. I loved this boy. So much. So so much. And I knew he loved me too. And I couldnt ask for more. My eyes grew heavy, and I fell asleep in the arms of my destiny.

A slight jingle sounded from the bedside, waking a sleepy Christian. Gently, trying not to wake Cody he reached over the bed and pulled his cell phone from his pants pocket. The screen light nearly blinded him in the darkened room, but his eyes adjusted fast. The text message was one of many, from Todd.

_'Where are you?'_

_'I thought we were on for tonight?'_

_'I miss you.'_

_'Is something wrong?'_

_'Christian?'_

_'Hello?'_

Christian shut the phone and looked over at Cody. He looked like an angel sleeping. So peaceful and happy. Perfect. He opened the phone.

_'I'm with Cody, we r on 4 Friday nite. Promise.'_

With a click, the phone slammed shut and the room was darkened once more, this time by more than the night skies.

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A/N: Thanks so much for staying loyal to my story guys! Especially since I do not get to update alot. It means everything to me. Thank you! Please continue reading and reviewing. :)


	34. Friday

Chapter 34: Friday

Everything in my life has always turned into the worst pain one could ever feel. My brother died in war and my family has never been as close as people would think. Nothing is ever what it seems to be, especially our relationships. I've always felt so alone in the world. Alone and scared, fighting against everyone and everything. Until he came into my life, Cody.  
I think of him and my heart flies.. or well it used to. He is amazing and sweet, loving me more than anyone in the world ever has. What has happened to us? Why have I turned so cold against our relationship? Against the love inside me?

I walked forward the abandoned barn ahead of me. The calendar on my phone told me that it was Friday and the fresh footprints in the mud told me that Todd was waiting for me inside.

The barn was old. Red paint was peeling off of it and most of the barn had became a weird shade of pinkish brown. You could tell just by looking at it that it hadn't been kept up for many years. The grass around it grew tall like a small child and in the distance I could see an abandoned corn filled. I had been here so many times before. Who would have thought things could get so country in Boston? I tried to smile to myself but I couldn't.

Slowly I pushed open the barn door ahead of me. It creaked loudly, but let me enter despite my fear that the building might cave in at any given moment.

"Todd?" I whispered, my voice cracking.

I heard movement in the left corner and turned my head quickly to see him appearing from the shadows. His eyes were red and it was obvious that he had not been sleeping good lately. His face had pain and hurt written all over it. His clothes and face were dirty, probably from sleeping on the ground of the barn.

My heart jumped.

"I thought you had forgotten again." He said softly, not looking at my face but at the dirty ground the barn set on.

"No. I was with Cody. We..."

He looked up at me quickly and I could see the pain in his face. He inhaled quickly and let the air back out of his nose, his eyes closed.

"I thought you said you liked me." His eyes remained closed as the words broke into the air around us.

"I do Todd. But Cody, I love. I love him."

"You had ME first!" He screamed, his eyes opening. "I gave you EVERYTHING. You were my first! I loved you! I would have done everything to keep you! Then you let some blonde nerd walk in and destroy everything between us! Why do you think I was so angry? Why do you think I did those bad things? Did you not think I would be hurt! You left me and it was all for him!"  
He was now crying and felt a pain in my heart. This was all true. But I could not control my emotions, how I felt. I could not control how everything had changed and transformed.

"Todd. Please understand. People change, they grow and adapt. I have grown and moved on. I will always have a place for you in my heart. You were my first boyfriend! But Cody is my now. He is everything to me." I tried to speak softly. But the passion I had for Cody showed through my voice.

Todd walked up to me. Close. Before I could say anything his arms slipped around me and gripped me in a hug. His head laid on my left shoulder.

Softly he whispered, "If he means so much to you, why do you keep coming back to me? Why do you keep promising me you aren't leaving? And why do you steal wear the necklace I gave you to show my commitment?"

Todd stepped back and my hand found the necklace around my neck. It was made from the strangest rocks. Multi colored. Something I had never removed from my neck. I looked into his eyes. I had no answer for him. I was speechless. He was right. Why? Why was I so connected to someone I had thought I moved on from. My heart was torn.

"Listen to me, I am finished being your sexual release. And now that you and Cody finally sealed the deal I guess you won't even need me for that anymore either." Tears fell softly down his face as he stepped up close to mine. He looked me in the eyes, his full of pain. "Do not hurt him. Do not do to him what you did to me. He isn't as strong. He won't make it through it. It'll kill him."  
I watched as he turned and walked away from me. I had broke his heart in so many pieces. I truly hurt for doing that to him. The barn door creaked louder than ever as he slammed his hand out to push it open. I looked around. This had been out special place for so long. Now it was like a coffin. To bury everything we had ever had in. My heart ached as I remembered. My hand reached around to the back of my neck and released the necklace. I used a rusted screwdriver to dig a small hole in the dirt. I placed the necklace inside and covered it in the dirt.

It was the most special thing he had ever given me. So I would leave it in the most special place we had ever shared.

I got up from my knees and exited the barn slowly. The sun was bright, promising.

I felt inside my heart that this was the way things were meant to be. Todd would be ok in the end and so would everything else. I loved Cody. He was an angel, beautiful, smart, sweet, and perfect. He was everything that I knew I wanted but more than anything, he was everything I knew I didn't deserve.

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A/N: Please continue reviewing amazing people! Sorry i'm a slow poke. Hope you are all doing great! Thanks for your dedication to my story !


	35. Author's Note !

Hi guys! I know I haven't written anything on this story for THREE YEARS, but I just stumbled across it and honestly I kinda wanna continue it! Do I still have interest or has it all died away? Let me know what you think of me continuing the story!


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